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this post was submitted on 16 Feb 2024
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Mildly Infuriating
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Learning from mistakes. Learning that when you screw up, you don’t get a free pass to fix your mistakes. Learning to save frequently when working on a document. I can go on and on.
You are coddling your child and I feel bad for her.
It was my mistake, not hers.
So you're saying she should learn that when someone else makes a mistake, she doesn't get a free pass to fix it?
I should punish her for something I did? And if I don't do that, I'm coddling her?
I mean I guess it's not a terrible thing to learn that the people who have power over you will fuck you over when they make a mistake, but I'd rather her not think of me that way.
You do what you want with your kids. I'd rather my child not grow up to think her father was an abusive asshole who punished her for things she didn't do or have any control over.
Look at how you’ve handled this situation so far. Seriously, step back and take a look at it.
First, we can skip the typing for her because that’s been discussed to death. But then, when you found the mistake, you immediately started typing again and even called it cheating because you were trying to sound like a 13 yr old girl. You are teaching her that using any means necessary to get a good grade is acceptable.
Next, you are trying to blame the software and not take responsibility for your mistake. This is teaching her not to take responsibility but to instead find something else to blame for mistakes.
No, you should not punish her for your mistake, but you should instead teach her how to handle mistakes.
I guarantee that this will happen to her in the future when she is typing her own work. She will get mad, blame the software, then cheat to get a good grade. This is what you’ve taught her.
I'm pretty sure I did by telling her I fucked up, apologizing and rewriting the essay. Which is what she would have been expected to do if she had fucked up.
Also, when you say I did not take responsibility for my mistake, are you not including the part of my post where I wrote:
Or did you just not read it?
I really don't understand why you think me taking responsibility for my error and rectifying it teaches her a lesson that you should cheat to get a good grade. Because as far as I can tell, you keep suggesting that I should punish her for my mistake and make her rewrite it. Otherwise, what is your point here?
Yes. You should have made her sit with you and redo the entire assignment. Not as punishment, but as rectifying the mistake as she would have had to do had she been the typist.
Treat it as a learning moment and not as punishment.
She already learned that lesson by watching her dad fuck up, then fix the problem with his own effort. If he made her sit down and do the whole thing over again she would've instead learned a lesson by watching her dad fuck up, then fix it by making it someone else's problem.
OP already made it a learning moment. He told his kid it was his fault and he'd take responsibility for it. The kid also learned her parent has humility and has her back when things go wrong.
Sure, you can go the other route and have her re-write it, but I don't think that would've been as good a learning experience for the kid. "Life sucks sometimes kiddo. Sometimes you do nothing wrong and still get saddled with extra work and strife." The kid's 13. Give em a break, Red Forman.
You mean like when I said in my original post:
First you claim I didn't take responsibility, which I did, now you're saying I should have had her sit with me, which I did.
Did you read my post at all?
And you still haven't explained to me how me taking responsibility for my mistake, apologizing for it and then fixing the problem myself teachers her to cheat in order to get a good grade. Can you please explain that?
Ok. I’ll try to put it more simply for you.
The essay she is going to submit is not her words but yours.