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this post was submitted on 20 Dec 2023
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Buttcoin
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Buttcoin is the future of online butts. Buttcoin is a peer-to-peer butt. Peer-to-peer means that no central authority issues new butts or tracks butts.
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also urgent client calls because the database they rely on for literally every part of their business is slow and unreliable “for no reason” and you pop open the database and see the sheer volume of PL/SQL and immediately double your hourly rate
it’s worth noting that SQL as a language is basically an embedded COBOL data definition DSL. somehow it’s always arbitrary COBOL with financial programmers
i learned PL/SQL thirty years ago. thankfully i have forgotten every trace.
the last thing I did in college was learn COBOL as a joke, and I’ve been hiding it from my employers ever since
I learnt COBOL in the same august institution I learnt PL/SQL
given y2k pay rates i almost wish i'd kept it up a bit longer