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this post was submitted on 17 Aug 2026
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Asklemmy
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Not about the house but about the parents.
Mine also stayed independent far longer than we thought prudent. We kids lived far away. But it seemed like they had it together when we talked on the phone. We ensured they had meal boxes delivered and a person to come help clean up & check on them 1-2x/week.
Only after they both rapidly deteriorated and were moved to care facility did I get to really check things out. OMFG. The paper towels in the freezer. The stacks of unpaid bills. Mom's wedding ring which we accidentally found in an old shoe. And so on.
Same with my grandparents, droplets of bloody noses (or something) filthy bathrooms, decluttered but not clean, tons of expired food. Closer examination showed it was worse than we thought.