It's possible to both understand the reasons why the US election went the way it did, and hold individuals accountable for their behaviour, including the way they voted.

I have a lot of compassion for people who get so caught up in the right wing propaganda machine that they're willing to vote against their own best interest out of fear. I can't even begin to imagine living in so much terror of some nebulous other that I end up thinking it's okay to round up immigrants, bomb children, and criminalize people's gender identities. It sounds like a horrible way to exist in the world. I am so very angry at the systems that have allowed things to get this bad. That doesn't change the fact that those individuals are still responsible for the harm their actions - and votes - have caused, and people who are willing to throw away basic human decency like that rather than put the work in to examine their own biases are not welcome anywhere near my life.

In other words, causing harm out of misguided anger does not diminish the harm done. So, fuck 'em. It's not my job to play nice in the hopes that they'll have some come-to-Jesus moment.