“better than eating broken glass”

Oh, you mean better than Windows Vista Aero.

I'm not sure they've even cleared that bar, to be honest

You say that but did you know that our new bowl of broken glass now come with the new groovy lemon© * topping?

*** : the "groovy lemon" topping is not to be legally considered as lemon and may induce in some people nausea, headaches, cramps or digesting issues, the final user waive any legal rights or reclamation while using our products.