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I feel like my autism mighy of gotten me kicked out
(self.autism)
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I think for them it was more of me having higher support needs, I wouldnt just do house chores, and it got worse if I was overwealmed by work. Generally it built as resentment over time
Yeah, it can be difficult when ND people are exhausted and can't do their share in a timely manner. Usually, I find that all this requires is a tweak to chore schedules as long as it's temporary and reciprocal. Just as an example, not a recommendation in itself, say it's your turn to do dishes this week and you are particularly exhausted. If you're alone your future self would be responsible for double duty, but that's totally fair. When loving with someone, if you ask them to do the dishes you also need to commit to picking up one of their dish days in the future. This kind of thing doesn't always work, but as long as you're fair about it and not just so selfish that you don't do dishes, ever, it can work.
It can also work across chores. Some chores are more exhausting to one person than some others, so split that way, one does all the dishes and the other all the laundry for example (though it needs to be equivalent chores) not something like yard work thst only exists in summer and only once a week vs dishes that are every single day.
You can also use resources as substitutes in some cases, as long as this isn't someone you share those resources with. For example if you keep money separate, you might be able to hire someone to do your share.
Making example schedules and examples of how exceptions would work might be worthwhile both to ease your fears and to help another person provide those accommodations with less effort on their end and thus less likely to feel resentment.
However, if you're in a position where you don't have resources, can't find adequate trades, and even when you're alone these things are not getting done, resulting in possibly unhealthy living conditions, it might require help of a healthcare professional to help you with finding other ways. A good therapist who specializes in neurodivergence or at least is familiar with the issues (something grossly missing from the curricula in many places since assumptions are even today often made that these are childhood issues and go away in adulthood and then it's just laziness or whatever). Or it may require medications to help you, just like a leg amputee requires a wheelchair, not because they can't live in society, but because society requires something they're not able to do without aids. I take Adderall and it has helped a ton for my particular issues even allowing me to get rid of other meds I was on for the disorders caused by trying to live in a society not built for me. Anyway, all of that stuff no one here can help with, unfortunately.