I try to.

The section on "requests" hits hard for me because I grew up in the Midwest, and work with a lot of people from the Midwest, and I often have to remind myself and them that it's okay to say no if the answer is no. I try to couch my requests as questions about feasibility rather than inclination for that very reason: "Do we have X available?" or "Do you have time to do Y?" rather than "Would you do Z?"

(If you're not from the Midwest or other subcultures with high-context communication style, you may be confused by the above. But its very rude to ask someone for something you think they'll refuse, as you're forcing them to do the emotional labor of saying "no" to you instead of you saying "no" to yourself.)

But the "observation without evaluation" and empathic portions of NVC are also very important.

I know it's been a journey for you trying to learn better how to get along with coworkers you find draining and difficult. I'm glad to see you taking the step of learning about NVC as a part of that, I think it can only help.