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this post was submitted on 17 Aug 2025
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Boil em, mash em, stick em up your arse
While you may be able to derive some small amount of nutrition from boiled and mashed potatoes in your rectum, it's usually advisable to consume them through the other end, since starch digestion starts with salivary amylase.
If you'd rather consume the potatoes anally, it's advisable that you find someone to spit into your anus to help the digestive process.
Safety advice: please note that the mouth is lined in stratified squamous epithelium, which is better prepared to handle rough mechanical/chemical/biological stimuli than the simple columnar epithelium of the rectal ampulla. It is therefore advisable to ensure the mashed potatoes are sufficiently cool before uh ~~ingesting~~ ~~scooping~~ consuming.
If I could upvote you twice...
Was fully expecting a hell in the cell ending to this post.