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Security Theater
(lemmy.world)
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this post was submitted on 08 Jul 2025
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Years ago I had a short inter-country flight in the EU.
Forgot that I still had my swiss army knife in my jacket. Noticed before the scanners. Thought "fuck. oh well, worst case I'll leave it here".
The people at the scanners didn't say a word.
On the way back, I remembered the knife again. Again on front of the scanners.
This time they noticed.
"is that a pocket knife in the jacket?" "uh, damn. yes"
Guy checks out the knife. Hands it back to me "next time put it in the suitcase".
I put it into my jacket and get on the plane.
When we land, I grab my stuff, including the jacket from the overhead compartment.
Sometime taps me on my shoulder, I turn around and see a steward hand me my knife, grinning. It fell out of my jacket when I grabbed it
Meanwhile, I get my dong dapped up every time I go through.
I had a lady in Cairo working my breasts like she was taking the lids off jars. Hornk hornk hornk. All behind a curtain so my modesty was protected.
Common check to see if you have fake screw-on boobs
Maybe it happens more than we know in the middle east.
Any screw on boobies have to go in the trays, no exceptions.
That's standard airport procedure: you have to unjar the jugs.
Personally I can't be arsed to protect my modesty; I'm trying to get on a flight. Just check the goods and lemme go on.
that's called an Alabama Handshake
They can't resist the dong
It's not even ginormous or nothin'
Madness.
Wassup Mr. Hotcock
I’ve circumnavigated the globe on 8 flights across 4 continents, with a knife (mistakenly) in my bag, only to have it detected on my last leg.
Then on domestic flights, I’ve been asked to take my knife out… so they can measure it.
You have been added to the knife length betting pool, someone may have made money off of it.