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“Maybe he just…” rude? (sh.itjust.works)
submitted 5 days ago by religion6614@sh.itjust.works to c/kindnesskommunityalt
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Sometimes, when I reassure my girlfriend, I’ll say when someone is an asshole, “maybe he just X”, like “maybe he just had a bad day” or “maybe he’s not mean, he’s just upset” or “your dad has to take care of the family, so when he’s mean to you or mom, he’s stressed since he cares”.

Am I being rude for this?? Kind advice please. Or when her online friend said “IM GONNA KILL EVERYONE” I told her it was a joke and she shouldn’t say anything because it was probably him joking.

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[-] InEnduringGrowStrong@sh.itjust.works 13 points 5 days ago

I get trying not to pick a fight, but your gf might also feel like you're being dismissive, which likely sucks for her.
Sometimes, even if you can't do anything about it, it's nice having someone that acknowledges you.

[-] religion6614@sh.itjust.works 2 points 5 days ago

thank you, how can I not be dismissive?

[-] Stillwater@sh.itjust.works 8 points 5 days ago

First, acknowledge how she feels and show her you empathize.

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this post was submitted on 12 Jun 2025
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