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When you are walking outside, do you often look around to make sure no one is following you? Do people normally do this, or am I just paranoid? (sh.itjust.works)

submitted 1 day ago by throwawayacc0430@sh.itjust.works to c/asklemmy@lemmy.world

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Like usually every minute I'd quickly look around to make sure there aren't weirdos following me.

For context: I'm a young-adult male, but I don't exactly have training in martial arts or anything, so I'm every time I see anyone that looks "tough" I don't feel safe.

When I was a kid, my parents told me the usual "stranger danger" talk. Also in movies and tv, there are usualy a lot of plot involving peoppe getting followed, and the victim never looks back. In crime stories, and in the news, people usually become a victim if a bad person follows them home.

So when I went to school as a kid/teen, I'd always be scanning my surroundings like very often, especially when nearing home, I'd be like looking around every 20 seconds to see if there's weirdos following.

Even as a young adult, I kinda still have this instinct. I mean, we hear about crime everywhere. I don't exactly live in a "slum", but I live in a big city, and more people generally means more crime, and statistically, crime is sort of an issue where I live, I mean, it'a a city, you know how it is. This is in the US btw.

I don't carry a gun, don't wanna have intrusive thoughts about killing myself so I don't want that, so I carry pepper spray just in case.

I mean, I'm probably not gonna change my behavior, I think its good to be cautious, this question is just me trying to see if there's anyone else out there think thinks like me.

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[-] OceanSoap@lemmy.world 11 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

Spacial awareness is good to have no matter who you are or what your situation is. What's not good is being constantly worried or paranoid.

I look for lots of things. Who's in the area, what's in the area and what are different ways to get out if I need to. But I'm not specifically on the lookout for weirdos, as in, I'm constantly worried they'll be there or anything. If I notice someone sus I keep tabs on them until I don't think it's a threat.

One night I was out walking my dog, who was still under a year old (he was already a big dog though), and a guy is walking in the opposite direction. I see him coming but he's got a hoodie on and pulled up over his head, ducked in a way that I can't see his face. My radar didn't go off, but I made sure to watch him out of the corner of my eye as we passed each other. Then, he turns and heads straight for me.

So, I turned towards him and put my hands up. I couldn't outrun him with my dog, and I figured once I started making a commotion my dog might help out.

It turned out to be my (now-ex) fiance playing a trick on me, seeing what I would do. Once he saw me square up he threw back his hood and gave me a lecture on how I should have ran.Fucking asshole behavior, but I guess now I know what I'd do in that situation.

Anyway, no one's ever done that to me since, but I still keep my wits about me. I also don't think I'm constantly going to be followed by creepers either.

this post was submitted on 16 May 2025

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