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me_irl
(lemm.ee)
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this post was submitted on 03 May 2025
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me_irl
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Hell, I'm 46 and it's really hard to not be cynical these days. I want to believe there's still good people out there but I run into so many assholes.
I'm also 40 something. Oh for the dizzy optimism of the 90s...
Optimism? Do you remember the entire grunge movement? GenX is full of apathy and pessimism. I still remember the day Kurt died, it was a defining moment in our lives.
I will forever seethe that I missed out on the 1990s, especially considering how IT was a money printer back then & the rave scene was top notch. I just about caught the tail end of the old internet as well, even that has gone to complete corporate dogshit.
And owning a house wasnt a Pipedream : (
I got in on the 90's dream and had a house with a handshake and a smile, lost it eventually because of family medical problems. Probably will never own a home again.
'Murca.
Ah the rave scene really was amazing. Have you seen the tiktok videos? The music and feeling will stay with me forever
Don't use tiktok lol, I've seen a few old clips passed around on forums and stuff uploaded to youtube though, shit looked great. Meanwhile the smallest rave gets shut down pretty quickly by the police these days : ( also pretty envious of pints being far more affordable back then, I barely even go to spoons as a student as it just costs way too fuckin much. I guess one upside of the modern day though is party drugs being cheap, pure and plentiful but that can obviously also have significant drawbacks.
I joined and deleted tiktok just to download the videos! I'm properly old now I swear everything was just better back then
Thats the way to use it lol, and I hear that a lot : ( most annoying this is we should be able to have a world where no one wants for anything anymore but alas no line must perpetually go up.
Uhh,, ok hmm..so I learned in life if everyone you see is an asshole, you’re the asshole.
Think about it this way: there are countless good people in your life but as a society we get taught to get fixated on the worst to complain about. Maybe it’s more entertaining. Maybe we sync to it cuz maybe we have similar features in ourselves we don’t like … which ever the reason it’s personal why we do this. But in doing so It’s easy to discount the good people by ignoring them and what they do. We notice every mistake and bad person out there.
And how do you think that makes good people around you feel?
Well they stop coming around. They get drained from being ignored. They put up boundaries where they don’t want to be around assholes fixated on the negative and don’t spend their time on assholes.
And that’s how we become assholes telling on ourselves by admitting everyone is assholes.
It’s the shoe smells like shit every where you go analogy.
Don't come here trying to gaslight me. 50% of our country are hateful bigots, it's pretty hard to avoid running into at least one every day.
Then what are you doing to chase off the other 50% who aren’t?
I surround myself with good people.
That’s the exact opposite of what you’re claiming in your first post. Now look who’s gaslighting. And you claim you were the victim of gaslighting. Yep, called it. you are the asshole.
You are misinterpreting what I said and I'm not going to waste any more time on you.
I lived by this phrase until I realized that most people are so blitheringly stupid that they are by default "assholes." I still treat everyone with respect and compassion, but I don't feel connected or very sympathetic to anyone anymore because now I know the truth and it's dark and if you don't see the broad, creeping darkness that is covering everything right now, you're choosing willful ignorance over community. You can still build community and make things better even accepting that there are lots of terrible assholes out there who will also benefit from your efforts.
Lack of curiosity, willful ignorance, science denial, choosing emotionally-pandering media, tuning out and not caring about anything outside of their immediate stimulation-sphere, creates a whole lot of people who aren't even thinking themselves better than you, because they're not thinking. People are training themselves broadly to not think and we're living in the effects of this decision.
Every time you choose to surround yourself with media and people whom would never argue or disagree with your notions, every time you say "I can't deal with this" every time you sneer at someone's personal story, every time you spend an hour scrolling social media, every time you avoid learning new things, you are pushing that "societal asshole meter" higher and higher.
And all of this doesn't even begin to touch on the very real, very prevalent people who are fucking hateful. Again, you can choose to be blind to other people's hate if you're not of the demographic that experiences being hated for arbitrary reasons, but there are plenty of people who are hated and bullied every day by people who are indeed, evil. We can't be afraid to call a goddamn spade a spade.
And people (like you) who are trying to convince us that spades are not spades, are upholding an unfair and deeply oppressive system because they have either privilege of class, race or ignorance.