Spider plants.

The expression on my husband's face when I found a sad spider plant after Halloween and said "Do you think I can save it?" would tell you everything you need to know about how well I keep plants. I've got two black thumbs.

Somehow, though, I've kept this reject spider plant alive for 6 years, and propagated it to make dozens of plants for other folks.

I've absolutely neglected this thing, and somehow it loves it. Water? Might happen weekly, might happen monthly. Sunlight? I forget to open the blinds half the time. Laves crusting up? I just chop them off and hope for the best. It's indestructible!