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Why would'nt this work?
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I'm going way way out against the standard model here.
No spacetime, no dark matter or dark energy, not even photons.
Just a '3D big ball of yarn single object universe'.
If light is a 'turn of the "stick"', then gravity is how 'the "sticks" are binding the atoms together'.
And so there would not be any gravity waves.
And any measurement of them would then have nothing to do with gravity.
And gravity is instantateous, and if not, really really fast or planets and stars would slingshot themselves out of orbit.