If I really ever need to use Publisher (rather than Scribus or Inkscape), I'll bust out my paid-for copy of Microsoft Publisher 98. Now if only I could find an optical drive...

Awoo?

Be aware: Newsweek has a history of posting stories that placate and reassure the non-MAGA crowd. I don't 100% trust their intentions as an organization. Kamala Harris was definitely going to win according to Newsweek, the week before the election.

I'll show you how hard my drives are.

Oh no! Anyway...

Let me explain the situation for those who don't know:

Once, there was this girl who

Swore that one day she would be a figure skating champion

And when she finally made it,

She saw

Some other girl who was better

And so she hired some guy to club her in the knee cap.

Surprise level: 0

What? I can't hear you over the stroad.

Age restrictions are, and always have been, ridiculous.

Be aware: Newsweek put out a string of content before the election, making it clear that Harris was winning and that Democrats were in the clear when few other news outlets were being that optimistic. Recently, they've been putting out a lot of articles talking about how the Orange One is losing popularity. While I hope that's true, they definitely have a weird angle. Take their content with a big grain of salt.

There will soon come a time when I am only able to shop for a new car at a junkyard.