So, this is a fairly lengthy discussion.

I am active duty, for context. Generally, ADHD is at enlistment is a disqualifier, to my knowledge. I Wonder now, of my medical providers in the service saw.my symptoms and decided not to probe it or inform in an attempt to keep my record 'clean'. I did not have any inclination at enlistment to my having ADHD.

So, I suppose I am for one, complaining, and for 2 making the statement that for service members with ADHD, spec. undiagnosed, we are are far behind in identification, treatment, and care compared to private enterprise and that it is shameful and I will now make an effort to educate my peers and ensure they consider the possibility of ADHD as likely-if they have it- they are [blissfully] unaware and the system is not helping.

I've not read the whole thing- to be honest. Its just so ironic that despite the zeitgeist of highlighting the importance of mental health in the military, social media prevalence of spreading awareness amd acceptance of all kinds of disorders amd lifestyles, here we are, here I am in exactly the situation people have been warning us (the general population and the military) since COVID and maybe before.

I must also say that I am grateful in a sense. Had I not been able to enlist I do not think I would be in the socioeconomic status I am now. It is like a trade- sacrificing medical care and work accommodations for money- and sacrificing my semse of morals as well---I am not a fan of being a part of this machine amd what it does. But now I have agreed to be complicit for a while longer until retirement.

For ADHDers who were diagnosed earlier, I would be lying if I did not say I was jealous. But I am also sympathetic to you if your symptoms (or just in general) led you to dowm a rougher path without the assurance of job which undoubtedly jas built in safety-nets. I know comparrisons is not always healthy.Life is one big gamble innit?

Let's make the most of it.

I do think the military has some unique effects on ADHD, especially life aboard a boat.

• "Their findings revealed an estimated ADHD prevalence ranging between 7.6% and 9.0%, depending on the diagnostic method. Intriguingly, the highest prevalence was found not in the youngest age group (18-19 years), but rather among those aged 25-29."

• "The findings indicate a higher ADHD prevalence in military personnel than in the general population, with adult ADHD primarily manifesting as impaired executive functioning and more inattentive symptoms"

I am going in for the assessment I asked for, today.

Purpose of this post is primarily for me to set some realistic expectations based around the results I am increasingly ( perhaps desperately )hoping for. I have specifically asked for an Autism and ADHD assessment. Although Im quite sure about latter, the former I am really not sure about. (Sometimes I think No its not possible, other times I think 50/50, amd other times I think it absolutely must be true- lately I've been thinking maybe 30/70 its true -30 its true-70, not true-).

So....I walk in, do it amd he says no you dont have ADHD nor the other nor any other conditions not spoken of.

Perhaps you can give some words of advice for how to handle this in the most healthy way.

I suppose my first thought is...wow so Im just not trying hard enough(performance/professional/personal), im not willing enough to put myself in uncomfortable positions, (social issues) and Im not disciplined enough (routine housework/errands, exercise, hobbies, etc)

Then I have to come to terms with that for a moment and consider if I habe enough suspicion still that this assessment was simply incorrect.....and I have to find a different place.

It was hard in thr first place to ask for this because it conflicts me morally, I dont think it is right for me to say "I may have this or that or I definitely do" and so on..that is the "doctors" job. I have been getting better at refraining that thought but if this occurs then it may be resurface more starkly. I will have to rely on myself (and hopefully you all, ) to find another assessor.

Should the opposite happen, I think I am ready for it. (Opinions?)

Alternatively he says I have some condition not considered and in this case i am also not so sure. I suppose worst case scenario I am sociopath, psychopath, and or narcissistic---I have no idea how to accept that. But I know maybe I should consider it?

Anyway- just trying to make sure my expectations are set and any words of consideration are appreciated but I suppose not needed

I am a person, 31, I have at times had the thought that 'I must be Autistic' and other times I have had the complete opposite thought. Currently, after taking a few online batteries and reading a bit more Im quite sure I am not.

Reasons I think I am not revolve around 3 symptoms/ criteria - repetitive gestures and routines.

I do; however, highly suspect I have ADHD.

I suppose my question 'boils down' to this, probably naaive idea thst autism is the exact opposite of ADHD, where I struggle entirely with keeping my apartment clean, getting taxes done, and enjoying my hobbies (increasing knowledge of topics I like, collecting thinks revolving around the topics, engaging in regularl, habitual activities with structure-structured engagement). It seems that Autism would he a silver bullet if I could somehow catch it.

I know this is ignorant, naaive and maybe even disrespectful or hurtful. I also am aware that there is a significant percentage of people who have both. I'd like to say that I do not mean to hurtful in this today's impulsive quest.

Questions for real this time--

*If you are Autism/ADHD, which did your doctor notice/diagnose first?

Which did you notice might be apparent first, if you weren't diagnosed by guidance of parents?

Do you feel a constant friction between these two sorts of things? *

I suppose I really have quite a number of questions if you (individuals whom are AuDHD or either or and are also reading this post on this phenomenon)feel like fielding them.

Apologies for the poor structure. And I hope to hear your inputs.

I suspect I have ADHD (maybe inattentive).

Never have suspected this to be true until a few months ago - I am 31 years old.

Sadly, I used to think about people who said they have ADHD were making excuses for their poor behavior or work performance. (Sorry I guess)

'Everyone has a little bit of ADHD' 'We are all a little autistic'

How do you folks deal with statements such as these? And is it possible the people saying this are undiagnosed amd projecting (like I think I was)?

Recently when someone says that I simple say 'No, (disorder x, y, z) is a (category i.e. developmental) disorder meaning the person's CNS or psyche has developed incorrectly'

Which simply yields more arguing. . .

My next question---

Background - I have struggled my whole life with life. My apartment is constantly messy save a few weeks out of the year, my insurance goes un updated and I drive illegally, I do not speak to people for days on end (family included), deadlines are almost never met, the phrase 'anything without immediate and serous consequence, is invisible and impossible to do' is very accurate to my entire life.

I have been searching for 31 years (more or less) for explanations as to why I am so much more dysfunctional than my peers

Question: Is ADHD/ADD really this debilitating, or must it be a combination of things?

Because if this ultimately explains most if not all of my difficulties, why isnt this treated as a severe disability? Because I am barely capable of doing anything if there.

Are no immediate consequence - and for many adult things- there are not.

Additional ramble- I initiated an assessment with a psychologist outside of my insurance coverage as it has been too difficult for me to navigate the system so I am paying out of pocket. I initially asked for an autism/ADHD assessment/ but after doing more learning I see autism as less likely in my case although perhaps I dont know.

I am so frustrated that at 31 years old and multiple encounters with psychologist, psychiatrists and other MDs none have ever even hinted at ADHD the most I've gotten is--mild and or moderate depression, general anxiety/social anxiety