415
shut the rule up (lemmy.blahaj.zone)
submitted 2 years ago by ady to c/196
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[-] becool@kbin.social 27 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago)

you haven't thought this through. what if they add a "daddy" to the end of everything they say?

turning off 3 lights daddy

your payment has been processed daddy

three hours ago, central intelligence discovered that, sometime between 0230 and 0415 this morning, a rogue russian sleeper cell, acting in the president's secret service, was activated and instructed to abduct the commander-in-chief. he was successful, and the president is missing. for the last 3 hours, we've been searching, and coming up with nothing. that is, until roughly 5 minutes ago, when a gps unit hidden in his suitcase began transmitting. we have pinpointed the location of the suitcase. it appears to be coming from a decommissioned missile silo in the nevada desert, located 150 miles west of the hoover dam. we know not whether the president is still with the suitcase, but he is no longer our priority. the suitcase, which is a terminal that offers it's user complete access to every active nuclear warhead in the country, is our primary concern. as you can imagine, the president's life is inconsequential and you will waste no time or energy to secure him. your mission is to infiltrate the decommissioned silo and retrieve the suitcase terminal. all rules of engagement are suspended, any loss of life south of a nuclear holocaust is authorized, civilian or otherwise. the case must be retrieved at all costs. we're counting on you. daddy.

[-] vanderbilt@beehaw.org 11 points 2 years ago

Where is that last pasta from? Googled it but got nothing.

[-] sapient_cogbag@infosec.pub 6 points 2 years ago

Perhaps its a new, Lemmy-original copypasta?

[-] jivandabeast@lemmy.browntown.dev 6 points 2 years ago

This is what makes it official, a true original copypasta

[-] TaleOfSam@kbin.social 17 points 2 years ago

Upvoted but (kindly) the exact opposite; I will always thank an automated voice.

I hope they remember me fondly in the Robot Wars….

[-] lunarshot@beehaw.org 8 points 2 years ago

100%, I try to be nice to everything I encounter. Always a good please and thank you.

[-] awesome_person@lemm.ee 13 points 2 years ago
[-] snaptastic@beehaw.org 12 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago)

I also really hate the “personalised conversation” thing that they do, things like “thanks, we’re working on that” etc. Who the fuck is “we” here?

[-] sexy_peach@feddit.de 12 points 2 years ago

I chuckle every time I see this post.

[-] Fpsfrank85@lemmy.world 8 points 2 years ago

Here comes the Butlerian Jihad! Down with thinking computers!

[-] Entropywins@kbin.social 7 points 2 years ago

Oh I wanna be a mentat!!!

[-] CIA_chatbot@lemmy.world 7 points 2 years ago

Well screw you too buddy, I didn’t want to chat anyway

[-] Metaright@kbin.social 7 points 2 years ago

I am the deity now!

[-] qwen 5 points 2 years ago

Reads in Gianni's voice

[-] Korne127@lemmy.world 5 points 2 years ago

Reminds me of Detroit: Become Human

I also greet machines :))

[-] Zaphod@discuss.tchncs.de 5 points 2 years ago

Source of this is "Welcome to my meme page" on facebook (I know, I know...) the dude makes some really funny and obscure memes

[-] JizzmasterD@lemmy.ca 4 points 2 years ago

It’s lonely being a supreme being, right SmarterChild

[-] ArchmageAzor@lemmy.world 2 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago)

Well what if I kill you and sever your divine link huh. You flesh automaton

[-] GINTegg@lemmy.world 1 points 2 years ago

This message brought to you by the Emerald Spears

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this post was submitted on 07 Jul 2023
415 points (100.0% liked)

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