Are you stupid?! I make 1 billion an hour repairing door hinges! What kind of fool takes this kind of "deal"
Scam! Release the door hinge files!
Yes. I can spend those two hours watching door hinge repair videos on YouTube, I was going to do that anyway.
Spend 2 hours watching door hinge repair videos followed by buying a new house since you have 500m.
A new house! Just think of all the new doors with hinges that need adjusting.
Sure you were. And then you were finally going to get around to fixing them, right!? Just take your precious money.
As long as I can break door hinges for those 2 hours, I'm good.
This is how those onlyfans promo account posts read. "Would you (obese gamer virgin) fuck me (fit nude model) however you want if I begged you for it enough????"
And then the comments like "yes baby I'd love to 😋😍😉"
I fucking hate this whole dynamic.
"If you could do anything with me in a hotel room, what would you do?"
On a serious note, if you have a striped screw hole on a door hinge, put some tooth picks in the hole, snap off the bit that sticks out, and put the screw back in. I’ve fixed so many doors this way.
Does it matter what direction the stripes run on the screw? :)
To add to this, a stripped screw into concrete or brick can be fixed with the same method but using a small piece of copper wire the length of the screw.
You don’t need wood glue? Just the toothpicks?
I’ve gotten many loose screws tight with just toothpicks, no glue.
What rhymes with orange?
No it doesn't.
"Sporange" does. If you're especially bad at pronouncing words, many other things also rhyme with orange, like flange, range, and monkey.
Doorhinge
Plot twist, you're teleported in a room that will be set on fire if a switch isn't pressed within 2 hours and broken door hinge blocks you from pressing it
Every broken doorhinge can be bypassed in two ways. Fix it. Or break it more.
WTF is this on about?
You can pretend, you can lie to yourself and us - your friends - but your door hinge repair addiction is becoming a problem.
So we've pooled some of our resources together to try to help you...
"Name 10 things that aren't Jackie Chan!"
Uuuuhhh… Laptop, horse, Jackie Chan — Damn!
You all are misinterpetting this. If in the rest of your life you spend 2 hours or more fixing door hinges the 500 million is revoked and if you're in the negative now they take your organs to make up for the deficit.
If I had half a billion dollars I can promise you I would be spending zero seconds of the rest of my life screwing in door hinges.
I can imagine the genie thinking “Bwahaha I tricked you!” and then getting increasingly frustrated that I never fix a door hinge again even though I didn’t notice the trick wording.
Right? It's like... let's see. I have half a billion dollars. I just noticed my door hinge isn't working correctly. Do I
A. Attempt to fix it, requiring maybe a trip to the hardware store, but at the minimum some time and effort
B. Ask my assistant to call someone and go back to playing video games
I know what I'd do.
If I had that money I could finally pursue my passion of fixing door hinges.
I would simply use $250 million to buy replacement door hinges for the ones I can't fix during that time. Easy peasy.
I just honestly don't think I could. They say money can't buy happiness and it sure as hell can't buy a properly self installed and adjusted door hinge.
I work for a door company, that's going to be super difficult
They'll probably fire you. What will you do without a job!?!
And how do I explain my income to federal agencies?
Pretty sure there's no IRS anymore. Just give Trump some gold-plated turd and you get a no taxes season pass.
As long as you pay taxes on it, IRS ain't snitching.
Like, I am not allowed to or I just physically can't?
what am unhinged proposition
What's the ruling on paying someone to fix a door hinge? Knowing my luck it's when the bathroom and front door comes off.
Replace your 'door' hinges with 'cabinet' or 'industrial maritime' hinges and your semantic loophole is set.
define "fix"
Like with all the exes!
Pro tip:
If the holes in the door frame are wallowed out, jam some pieces of toothpick in there first, then put the hinge on and screw it in.
I would buy a tent and a pickup truck. Then I'll set up a tent in the back of the pickup truck. And I'm going to have a house on wheels without door hinges because tents don't have door hinges. Crazy enough?
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