664

Honestly, I don't believe its fair to say "all you can eat" unless its true. Otherwise, you should put some type of detailed limit.

But attempts must have been made and probably continue.

top 50 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[-] UsernameLost@lemmy.ml 71 points 2 years ago

I went with my Vietnamese colleague to an all you can eat sushi place in Savannah after we spent two weeks doing hurricane response when I was still in the Coast Guard. This dude ate 32 rolls of sushi, and the old lady running the place loved him. At a certain point, I think she just wanted to see how many it would take before he tapped out. I think I ate ten or twelve rolls, and just sat there in awe while the dude just kept shoveling food into his mouth. To be fair, we'd been working 20 hour days for two weeks and the ship was running out of food before we pulled into port.

Later on, found out that same dude cheated on his wife, then found out his wife was pregnant, they tried to work it out, she had a miscarriage, and he filed for divorce two weeks later. Fun times

[-] RampageDon@lemmy.ml 35 points 2 years ago

That was an M. Night Shamalamadingdong twist to a story about buffets.

[-] WhiteHawk@lemmy.world 20 points 2 years ago

What an emotional rollercoaster this story was

[-] Aviandelight@mander.xyz 15 points 2 years ago

I had a sushi binge once back in college. I went to eat lunch with my friends at the local Vietnamese place and we definitely overate. I was supposed to meet with my frat sponsor later that night and was worried that I might not get dinner before 9pm. Turns out my sponsor had planned to surprise me by taking me out to a fairly upscale sushi place for dinner since he knew I loved it. We get to the restaurant and he orders "the boat" which contains like 50+ pieces of sushi (for just the two of us). When the food came out I was worried I wouldn't be able to eat but turns out I can make extra space for sushi. I demolished that boat and ate more than my sponsor. He was legit impressed when I finally admitted that I had eaten a big lunch before hand.

load more comments (4 replies)
[-] Climinteedus@lemmy.world 9 points 2 years ago

I liked the first half of this story :(

load more comments (1 replies)
[-] pec@sh.itjust.works 7 points 2 years ago
load more comments (2 replies)
[-] Kecessa@sh.itjust.works 6 points 2 years ago

Imagine four guys that workout a lot, trying to gain mass after a cut, going to an all you can eat sushi place...

The waitress was just laughing her ass off when passing by our table and seeing another order slip, we filled the table four times before we felt we had enough...

load more comments (1 replies)
[-] Potato_in_my_anus@lemmy.ml 5 points 2 years ago

It must've been the 100 rolls of sushi that provoke the cheating...

load more comments (1 replies)
[-] lemonadebunny@lemmy.ca 4 points 2 years ago

Have you ever considered writing for the Saw films?

load more comments (2 replies)
load more comments (9 replies)
[-] DragonTypeWyvern@literature.cafe 47 points 2 years ago

All you can reasonably eat within a given time limit does roll off the tongue

[-] RaivoKulli@sopuli.xyz 5 points 2 years ago

Would be more honest though. If I'm taking it slow eating then I'm taking it slow goddammit.

[-] pjhenry1216@kbin.social 19 points 2 years ago

I think this is targeting folks who finish eating a meal and then never leave the restaurant. So a more technical truth would be all you can eat within the reasonable definition of how long one meal lasts.

[-] Ghoti_@lemmy.world 4 points 2 years ago

Me and 5 other fatties in middle school (like almost 20 years ago) got kicked out of a CiCi’s pizza for eating too much food in like 30 minutes.

We were like the first people who ate so much that they started losing money lmao

load more comments (1 replies)
load more comments (4 replies)
[-] DrChickenbeer@artemis.camp 39 points 2 years ago

This is quoting a famous stand up comedy routine by John Pinnette:

https://youtu.be/aLkTuWdKrqY?si=W6b8bXI4IgvSSjiW

[-] Bealte@lemmy.world 11 points 2 years ago

May he rest in peace. I miss his comedy.

[-] guycls@lemmy.world 36 points 2 years ago
load more comments (1 replies)
[-] itsgroundhogdayagain@lemmy.ml 34 points 2 years ago
[-] Techmaster@lemm.ee 9 points 2 years ago

You be here four hour! You go home now!

[-] bazus1@lemmy.world 6 points 2 years ago

god rest is funny, funny soul

[-] themeatbridge@lemmy.world 6 points 2 years ago

Eat vegetable!

[-] TurnItOff_OnAgain@lemmy.world 4 points 2 years ago

Get out of the line

[-] TronnaRaps@lemmy.ca 4 points 2 years ago

Eat brocorri

load more comments (1 replies)
[-] CrayonRosary@lemmy.world 30 points 2 years ago

There was an attempt to make a funny post by a person who doesn't know this is a direct quote from a comedian.

[-] KrisND@lemmy.world 7 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago)

Could you cite the direct quote? Curious because I typed it up myself based on my own thought. The photo is more like a meme now.

[-] 1ird@notyour.rodeo 17 points 2 years ago

John Pinette is who you're looking for.

[-] El_Segundo@lemmy.world 21 points 2 years ago

Do these seem like the actions of a man who had "ALL HE COULD EAT?"

seriously though just put a 1 hour limit on it

[-] JJROKCZ@lemmy.world 19 points 2 years ago

All you can eat for one meal, they can’t have you sitting there for 8 hours when you’re only going to be eating at most 2 of those 8. You’re taking up space that could be used by other guests if you’re just setting up camp in the restaurant

[-] eee@lemm.ee 9 points 2 years ago

Most buffet restaurants get around this by closing for one hour between lunch and dinner, and/or a maximum time limit.

load more comments (2 replies)
[-] creditCrazy@lemmy.world 16 points 2 years ago

It's all you can eat in 4 hours restaurant

[-] Retrograde@lemmy.world 6 points 2 years ago

3 hours 59 minutes* restaurant

[-] aesthelete@lemmy.world 13 points 2 years ago

Alright, who tried to squat in this restaurant after paying for the buffet?

[-] KrisND@lemmy.world 9 points 2 years ago

The entry was $18, the sign said open 24hrs...I was just trying to save on rent and food.

load more comments (1 replies)
[-] ChillPill@lemmy.world 11 points 2 years ago

what did you do after you left the all you can eat buffet?

We pretty much went straight home.

Mrs Simpson, may I remind you that you are under oath.

We drove around for 4 hours looking for another all you can eat seafood buffet

[-] chiliedogg@lemmy.world 10 points 2 years ago

"You can't make me stop. The sign says 'All you can eat for 16.99."

"Yes sir. 4 plates is all you can eat for $16.99.

load more comments (1 replies)
[-] Transcriptionist@lemmy.world 9 points 2 years ago

Image Transcription:

A photo of a restaurant window with the text decal reading: Chinese Restaurant All you can eat buffet Not mean all day buffet You no come stay 4 hour You eat - you go home

[I am a human, if I’ve made a mistake please let me know. Please consider providing alt-text for ease of use. Thank you. 💜]

[-] KrisND@lemmy.world 4 points 2 years ago

Question, what's the best method of putting the transcription on posts on lemmy? At the top, bottom, does it matter if I bold the "Image Transcription" text?

I fully understand and agree it's important just not sure the best way to use it and I have to start remembering.

load more comments (1 replies)
[-] Mr_Blott@feddit.uk 8 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago)

Imagine if you will...

A society so morally bankrupt....

That a sign like this is necessary.

😂

load more comments (4 replies)
[-] Pixel@lemmy.sdf.org 7 points 2 years ago

This is funny but not a great way to express it as a business. Why not simplify and clarify, like: "all you can eat* buffet. * limited to one meal in one hour" perhaps add "no loitering" but maybe not needed

[-] dinckelman@lemmy.world 5 points 2 years ago

There have definitely been instances where I've stayed at a Chinese buffet for almost 3 hours, and they didn't really care. I got my food, sat down to eat and relax, and we didn't bother each other

[-] jpreston2005@lemmy.world 5 points 2 years ago

Used to do this when I was a teenager. Group of friends would shuffle into the china buffet around 2, then stay for 4 hours or so, so you can get two meals for the price of one.

we'd sit in the smoking section, smoke cigarettes and fuck around. We made up our own language with something like 50 words, all reenacted to a degree. to say "butterfly" you had to act out a caterpillar being slowly dissolved in it's own cocoon juices before emerging minutes later as a butterfly. it was a wonderful time.

we only ever sat there for hours when nobody else was there, though. if the place was crowded we'd eat and go so as not to be jerks

[-] Pulptastic@midwest.social 4 points 2 years ago

All you can eat 1 hour

load more comments
view more: next ›
this post was submitted on 25 Aug 2023
664 points (100.0% liked)

There Was An Attempt

6348 readers
1 users here now

There Was An Attempt, and they failed.

Share and discuss of when there was a sincere attempt made and they failed.


Rules

All lemmy.world rules apply.


MoreCheck out the Lemmy Discord

More coming soon! Under new development.

founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS