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I rarely feel attacked when I talk with people in person. And we all take people feelings into consideration enough so no one is trying to attack anyone.

I was not actively commenting on social media since I was 13. But when I joined Lemmy i saw the statistics only 1% of people are actively posting and commenting on social media. And since I knew I was in 99% of people who are only consuming and really wanted Lemmy to take off I tried to be more active.

But now I find myself way too often attacked and attacking. And I always judged people that are attacking others on Xitter or Facebook.

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Best way to respond to toxicity is with a "lol, loser" and block. Dont even elaborate, not worth typing paragraphs and argue. Or if you want, you could just not reply anything at all and just block.

[-] boredtortoise@lemm.ee 3 points 1 day ago

Debates need multiple consenting participants, so arguing unprompted from out of nowhere is bound to gather annoyance

[-] AsudoxDev@programming.dev 3 points 1 day ago

You need to grow some thick skin if you are going to interact with people on the internet.

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[-] Acamon@lemmy.world 2 points 1 day ago

My take is that written communication is hard, unless a) you know each other really well, e.g. messaging friends, or b) you write carefully and with enough detail to help the other person understand fully your position, and they bother reading with the same care.

When you read an essay or article it of often begins by setting out the problem, giving some context and even defining their priorities and approach, before they make a claim or argument. They spend time addressing the obvious criticisms of their argument, and ideally admiting weak spots, and maybe even empathising with why someone might reject their position. This means that when you read an article like that, even if argues against something important to you, you don't feel attacked. It's calm, general reasoning, and obviously not a personal a attack on you as an individual.

But if you post an picture of the secondhand car you've saved for two years to afford, and the first comment is "fuck cars, they're killing the planet" it's easy to feel like it's a personal and it's aggressive. Or if you write a pretty reasonable but contraversial opinion, people might not have the time or will to break it down and explain why it's wrong, but they don't want other people to read it and think it's okay, so they down vote and comment a quick "what is this shit ?"

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this post was submitted on 14 Nov 2024
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