At least you didn’t eat the onions at McDonalds

At least it wasn't just me.

And his devotees would have cut off their own fingers in solidarity.

I think the JC Penney photos would actually work with swing voters. They just need a reason to not be ashamed to vote for him.

There's a picture of me as a kid holding a baby alligator. You can just tape their mouth shut, the jaw muscles to open their mouths are weak, it's closing their mouth that can crunch bone. I'm not sure the gators like it much though, lol.

On a tangentially related note, check out Gatorland if you're ever in Orlando. It's a fun time and one of the few remaining old Florida tourist attractions and a perennial field trip destination for the local school kids, that's why I've been there several times.

It would have been Hugo Boss.