[reposted here from reddit]

Hi Davey,

I mean no disrespect in sending you this, but perhaps I should. Your family’s actions have destroyed much of what is left of my life. I haven’t felt like I’ve had much to live for in years because of it.

I am happy that you opened up the communication between us last year. It was a big relief to know, that despite the harassment I endured from you, it was not from dangerous individuals. However, I do believe that you put our lives in danger on multiple occasions. I was happy to believe that your harassment would finally end. It was a weight taken off my shoulders which helped me start to recover, but that was very short lived, as you turned it right back on again. I have to believe that it was due to some unfair complaint about me, given from your cousin.

At some point in time throughout the 10 years, I had already come to the conclusion that the harassment I received was from you. The vast amount of resources that I've seen used here could not have been provided by any non-governmental agency. Oh well. It's my luck that my ex-wife has a relative working in such a position of legal power.

I decided to meet up with my childhood friend and take some time off to recover for what you've done. It was not my plan to be away for that long, but I still had healing and recovery to do. It was the healthiest time that I've had in over a decade since your harassment started. I felt my body heal and my mind recover. I made some great progress and I was feeling happy again. I even met someone special on my trip that I continue to speak with every day. I just wish I could have done that with my child.

When I returned, the harassment from you started again in full swing. It first started with your cousin, refusing to allow me to see my child on on a special day. It was very clear in the court order and I was no way unfair. Your cousin had absolutely no right to create an issue about this. I can only imagine the spun story she gave you to cause you to take action. Do you know what it’s like to look forward to seeing your child on her birthday after being gone for so long, only to be refused and antagonized by her mother.? And then I was told that I wouldn’t see her for two weeks following because she is on vacation with her mother. I received your cousin’s refusal message the minute I landed. I broke down in tears at the airport. Shortly after being triggered by her actions, I sank into that dark place, broken by her intentional words, once again. Was it the length of time that I was gone that they convinced you to be upset about as well? I don’t regret any of the decisions or actions that I made surrounding my departure and return and how I handled your cousin. And it’s not your job or your family’s job to be the judge and jury here. Your cousin was very wrong in what she did. You already know my stance on her malicious behavior towards me. She has involved you and her father in a never ending fight to destroy my life. Is everyone taking pleasure in what they are doing to me to the point that I constantly ask myself what did I do that was so bad to bring on so much anger and hatred? To constantly question the declining quality of my life. I’ve expressed to you the fact that overall, I’ve lived a good life towards other people. I treated people above and beyond the way I would want to be treated. I want to reinforce that fact. You accused me of being bad towards women. I loved my mother, my sister and now my daughter who are all women. I would do anything to protect and advance them. I’ve been good to the women throughout my life. I was dumbfounded by your accusation that I wasn’t, but I understood where that belief was coming from.

When you reached out to me a year ago, it seemed like you were under the impression that I was going to commit suicide. I assured you I wasn’t, but you’ve caused so much damage to my life that I often questioned what I had to live for anymore. I was in a very bad place a year ago. I was heart broken, already a beaten man from your harassment and the harassment of your cousin and her father. I was antagonized by you or someone working for you on social media claiming to be my person that I cared for, and you continued to feed me false information to make me feel bad about myself. Telling me how bad my actions were towards a woman that I deeply cared about, and wanted to see succeed. Claiming that I put her in the hospital as a result of my actions and then your cousin chiming in to tell me that she spoke with my person, saying similar negative statements. Causing me to question her safety because of your actions. I was good to this woman and tried to help her the best I could, and the one night that she reminded me of your cousin's behavior was the night I asked her to leave and have never seen her again. The entire scenario was as if you were trying to feed me a taste of my own medicine, when I never created an ailment. This was already during a time in which I was distraught over how fucked up my life had become because of your family's actions.

This leads me to the question, why are you still doing this to me? I understand the strength of the bond between family, but when do you determine the actions you are taking are wrong? Have you taken enjoyment from what you have been doing? Perhaps you just don’t believe me when I tell you that I am not the offender. If you were trying to change my behavior, wouldn’t your approach of harassment have worked by now? For over 10 years you have revisited the issue, inflicting the same negative reinforcement towards me, time and time again. Has anyone ever informed you that negative reinforcement is not the best approach to change behavior, and yet you still inflict this pain upon me, with what appears to be without hesitation. These actions have brought fear, resentment and resulting destruction into my life and have made things worse, not better. Perhaps it is the money that your Uncle is giving you? Does he give to your foundation enough to destroy a person's life? Perhaps you get some satisfaction from the power and the pain that you are inflicting on me? If so, You are not the judge here. I follow that statement with a reference from the New Testament, although I could have taken the same out of the Torah or Quran or philosophies like Confucianism. Before you read it, I want to ask you this. Would you like to believe that the actions you take against me are minuscule compared to the bloated infractions that you think I am guilty of? The public resources that you use to accomplish your deeds against me. The risk you put on the people involved. The methods that are deployed to get what you need from me? The discarded oaths that you took to protect the people? Despite what you want to believe, I am happy to say that the world seems to be in agreement here:

Matthew 7: Do not judge, or you too will be judged. For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you. "Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother's eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye?

I want to reinforce with you the fact that last year, I, alone, decided that some of my behavior was creating issues for me and the people around me, and I, alone took the necessary action to correct it. I know the cause of my ailment and I welcome you and your family into the realm of the cause of my disease. A disease that you continue to inflict and multiply into my life.

To conclude, I want to remind you that I was a happy person over 10 years ago. I was not self destructive, I was successful and reliable. My unhappiness and the resulting actions coincide with what was done to me by your family, and still continues to this very day. What was created here was an endless stream of negative actions towards me, resulting in a slow and steady decline of my life, resulting in self destructive behavior and a general apathy towards life. Whether it be for money, or for satisfaction of inflicting pain, or the feeling of righteousness in inflicting some form of mistaken justice, I’m asking you to please stop what you are doing. Stop monitoring me, stop harassing me, just please stop. Encourage a better relationship between your cousin and myself. Help her and her father understand that I am not the evil person she has portrayed me as. I assure you that the moment my life starts an incline by your absence, my behavior will change. Please understand that it is not your job to monitor or maintain or correct my life. It is my life and my job to make it happy. The moment I feel that you are no longer in it, is the moment I decide that my life and my relationships will improve. The method you are deploying now is worse than suicide.

Sincerely,

Your Target