German here. Lived in Hamburg and Munich for about half my life each. They call Bavaria the Texas of Germany, but that's just in relation to the rest of Germany politically. German conservatism is nothing like American conservatism, thank God. Right-wing disinformation cancer is spreading in Germany, like it is anywhere else (AFD in the east). Any LGBTQ folks don't need to worry in any big cities. I'd recommend Munich over Berlin, but that's personal preference (Berlin is like Germany's London, loud, dirty, exciting, more crime than any other part of Germany, which is still less than most places in the US). Like, you won't 'feel' the difference between Hamburg and Munich politically. In Berlin you might find a few more people openly displaying their left or right leaning tendencies. It's also much cheaper than Munich, not sure if that matters.

It is more conservative than the north but German conservatism isn't quite as vile as the American flavor.

"Conservative" politicians here want to keep taxes for the wealthy low, suck off car manufacturers, keep marijuana banned ("it's forbidden because it's illegal"). In Germany, trying to enact an LGBTQ genocide is not really an ambition of the conservatives but of the fascist AfD which is strongest in eastern Germany but in recent polls got an uncomfortable 20% nationwide.

"Conservative" people in southern Germany will go to church, give you a weird side-eye if you work on a Sunday or have dyed hair, wear checkered shirts and get shitfaced at the biweekly state fair. Most are quite nice personally.

The towns and cities are way more progressive than the countryside and especially Munich which has had a socdem mayor for quite a while now. Hell the last csd had like half a million people, that's nearly a third of the population.

If you also like to consider other cities, Cologne might be something for you. It is known for it's gay and rainbow communities. It even advertises LGBT+ scene events on it's home page.

If you consider the area near Cologne and Düsseldorf along the Rhine, there are big cities but it gets more rural once you get further from the river. Jobs should be available there as well. Unfortunately, jobs without at least a fraction of office presence time are rare, even in IT.

Unless Munich, in this part of Germany, you walk into a bar a stranger but will find someone to talk to. People are warm and welcoming here. I cannot judge the English language proficiency though as a native. Besides, the local German accent can be just as puzzling here as in Bavaria. 🤣

I think I'm general you are right, the south is more Conservative. This ist probably because the south is rich. Most Money in Germany is produced in Bavaria, Baden-Württemberg (where I live) and Hesse. They cling to their money very badly, hence the conservative mindset. That being said, there are very progressive hotspots. The Capitals for example (Frankfurt, Munich, Stuttgart) are very open for differing views and Social political ideas. But you can go even better. If you look for City's with high Student concentrations you go more and more left. I am from Tübingen and this place hates conservatives. Anti LGBTQ Ideas must fear for ther physical protection. The same thing will be true in Freiburg and Konstanz in BW but I am sure there are places in the other two country's aswell. Can you give us an estimate where to go and how progressive the people should be? Then we will a place, I am sure.

Germany is more than Berlin and Munich. As a matter of fact, i know quite a few other cities that are much nicer and the cost of living there is way lower. Especially if you compare anything to Munich.

I'd say you're fine as long as you stick to the cities, even smaller ones. Maybe have a look at the exact place if you consider moving to the most provincial countryside in Bavaria or the east. And don't expect people there to speak english very well.

Considering 'conservative' people: The USA are on a different level than most of europe. 99% of conservatives here like things like health care. Many are okay with abortions being legal. And gas prices being high. And generally this country isn't divided into two political groups. Most germans will happily let you live your life, and won't bother you, even if they don't agree. There are a few assholes, however.

I'm not queer or from the south myself, so i don't really know what it's like to be queer there. I think it should be alright.

As a SW-German, I’d say it is way more a rural vs. urban thing. In the greater Stuttgart area f.i. don’t worry about openly living a gay lifestyle. If you live out in the woods, it might be different, but not necessarily so.

That being said, SW’eners are generally way more conservative towards any kind of “fun” or “flamboyant“ things - legacy of the very pietist history here.

Queer German woc here. And in tech too ! :D Yes, I do find it conservative. I live in Berlin. For all the hate that non Berliners like to lay on Berlin, it's an accepting vibrant place. And if you are vegan, you'll be spoilt for dining options. Vietnamese is crazy good here. And, concerts, there are multiple shows for different genres practically everyday. And several of them at sort of low-key underground places with their own charm. Berlin has its pitfalls but I don't underestimate the peace of not being stared at constantly for just living my life. Oh, and racism in rural areas: If you ain't white, enjoy some extra stares even when grocery shopping. Living outside the ring zone will give you the relatively quiet life you want. Rent is not cheap though. Cheaper than Munich though. But the rental crisis here is no joke either. There are some fun hacker and maker spaces here in Berlin: xhain and cbase for example that could be interesting for you. One thing I do live about Munich: if you are a hiker / mountain climber, that place is excellent. So many mountains and trails are nearby !!

Would you be able to afford remote workcation kinda thing ? You can test out the cities and see how you vibe with it.

As the others already said, it's more a rural vs urban thing but yeah the south and especially bavaria is more conservative than the north or south (but the most conservative like you discribed with the stickers and all are living in east Germany except Berlin, cause Berlin is mostly a left oriented stand alone city). If you're non white there would be at least a lot of staring, sometimes worse (spitting, shouting,...) mostly everywhere in Germany.

If you consider munich it shouldn't be a problem as long as you don't live in a village around the city. Cause Munich itself has a left political party for I don't know how many years. That's why mostly every other south Bavarian outside of Munich has the opinion that Munich doesn't count as Bavaria. And as mentioned by others before Munich has some good queer stuff and the pride parade is one of the biggest in Germany and EU. I think this year around 500k people came and celebrated (Munich itself has ~1.4 million residents), but Munich doesn't compare with Berlin(east), cologne(west) or Hamburg (north), but it's still pretty good and the nature around munich is great!

So I would say if you really wanna live in a city it's nothing like the crazy people you seem to have right now, but it's not all happy sunshine as well and especially munich is expensive and one big bummer are the German people as well (cause we're so stiff and not really open to someone new).

I live in Munich and it's not crazy here at all. At least by American standards. While people call Munich a big village it does not come with the backwards political attitude of villages and people generally don't openly advertise their political views. The state of Bavaria often likes to protrait itself as first among equals in politics which I think is where the reports of conservatism come from but it's not a problem I think.

Ok the queer subject: there has been a specifically gay subculture in Munich for quite a while and I think there are quite some queer folks in the local chaos computer club chapter as well. The Christopher street day is also celebrated in Munich.

Munich is a beautiful city, I'm sure you will feel quite at home once you got past the (comparatively) frosty German attitude and made some friends :)

Edit: formatting

i am from the north...real north...born 200m off the coast....the "conservativism" of the south is insane to me. switzerland and austria are even worse. it is not really about being a conaervative but that it is their coping mechanism to function as facists in a democracy.

for example in Badenwürtenberg there is a green minister whose perspectives on working with nationalists or how to tackle climate change are trump-level dumb/conservative.

over the years i got to meet several new friends that for various reasons had to start their migration to german in bavaria...and ALL of them were shocked once they were free to enter the civilized parts of germany. one girl had to go to school in munich and after she was free never went to bavaria again because of the constant hate. like facists in the US feed off triggering libs, tze south loves giving the impression equality is just because they allow it.

....but south east is worse....so, maybe dont go there.

You will be totally fine in any of the bigger cities.

I'd probably recommend the south even.

The south is generally very save and the cities are quite left-leaning. On the countryside and in smaller towns and cities you do see shit like you mentioned, though. Your Biden are our Greens and Habeck or Baerbock in that case, but definitely the same shit. Not as blatantly and openly as in the US, though.

I've heard of a black person being turned away at a bar by bouncers in Austria (which has similar culture to Bavaria), which is anecdotal. Also anecdotally, when I was there myself in the less-urban parts of Bavaria, I didn't see any non-white people.

It didn't remind me much of rural USA or what you described it as (my recollection of that is a bit fainter and more dated than urban USA).

Edit: the person told me the bouncer said “we don’t serve your kind here.”

If you care to look outside the box of your known cities: Cologne (like Munich) for it's openness regarding primarily gay folks. Since the increased popularity of LGBT+, the acceptance spreads to that forms to. Take this official city home page site as example.

As already said in another comment, the area near the Rhine (especially near Cologne and Düsseldorf) gets mute rural quickly

The others did a pretty great job commenting already but I want to add that Munich has many gay bars and quite a big Christopher Street Day (You might know it as a pride parade but in germany we like to make it half parade half demonstration in honor to the stonewall riots). I think the CSD is one of the biggest ones.