Honestly, while i can see why someone would be bothered by this, i don't think there's any solution to their concerns.
The whole point of this fediverse idea, as i see it, is that all the data is fundamentally controlled by a collection of entities instead of a centralised one. And you, as a mere user, have to choose which of these entities will have absolute full control of your data. Regardless of the source code of the webapp, if you're not fine with others having control of the data you willingly uploaded to their servers, the only way out is to self-host your data.
If you upload stuff on remote servers you don't control, you should always assume that you have no power over how that data is used. You can only hope for others to not be assholes, but you'll never have a true garantee.