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My wife was unimpressed by Vim
(programming.dev)
Welcome to Programmer Humor!
This is a place where you can post jokes, memes, humor, etc. related to programming!
For sharing awful code theres also Programming Horror.
Have you tried tiny macros with q and @? Syntax highlighting? Z-folds? Or turn vi into a hex editor with :%!xxd ?
If that doesn't work, try :divorce