69
you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
view the rest of the comments
this post was submitted on 21 Dec 2023
69 points (100.0% liked)
Asklemmy
43939 readers
384 users here now
A loosely moderated place to ask open-ended questions
Search asklemmy ๐
If your post meets the following criteria, it's welcome here!
- Open-ended question
- Not offensive: at this point, we do not have the bandwidth to moderate overtly political discussions. Assume best intent and be excellent to each other.
- Not regarding using or support for Lemmy: context, see the list of support communities and tools for finding communities below
- Not ad nauseam inducing: please make sure it is a question that would be new to most members
- An actual topic of discussion
Looking for support?
Looking for a community?
- Lemmyverse: community search
- sub.rehab: maps old subreddits to fediverse options, marks official as such
- !lemmy411@lemmy.ca: a community for finding communities
~Icon~ ~by~ ~@Double_A@discuss.tchncs.de~
founded 5 years ago
MODERATORS
Once a friend asked me to buy him cigarettes while I went into the store to buy some food for myself and he was waiting outside. I did it, but I hated every single second of it. The fact that the cashier, and anyone around me could potentially think I was a smoker... utterly terrifying. The humiliation was even greater when the cashier asked for my ID (I was around 20 that time, I looked young enough for them to assume I was underage). Disgusting, horrible experience. Never again.
There was another case, where my best friend actually didn't really ask for help, but it was a really serious case. Her mom got into jail as a victim of someone else's attempt to clear himself in a corruption case. I helped her with my savings (a thousand dollars or so) to get her out of jail. Well, this was another horrible experience, but in a different way. I would do it again if such a situation arises, but luckily her and her entire family have managed to move to a better country since then.
Ujhhhhh.... Huh.
I dislike smoking and have physically fought someone for intentionally and repeatedly blowing smoke in my face, but I don't think I'd have quite this reaction to someone asking me to buy them a pack.
I'd just say "nah I'm not helping you kill yourself" and leave it at that. If that causes a problem with our friendship, then they value their cigarettes and a moment of pleasure over our friendship and they aren't worth the time.
I'm with you in the "I helped bail someone out" though, not sure how I'd feel if someone asked me to help with that.