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submitted 2 years ago by Bebo@literature.cafe to c/asklemmy@lemmy.ml

It was sometime in early 2022 that I found myself reading a few romance novels. I remember being mildly annoyed about how most of the books had instant chemistry/attraction as part of the plot. Then I suddenly found myself wondering, how do I feel if and when I feel attraction? I think I have probably never felt instant attraction. When I look at a good looking man/woman I just feel an appreciation for their beauty, like how I would feel looking at a beautiful painting or photograph. At most all I feel is a wish is to look at them a few times more than is appropriate. I don’t remember how it feels like to feel attraction towards someone I have feelings for. The last time I felt strong feelings for someone was many years ago and I can’t recall my feelings now. I am very curious to know how other people feel when they experience attraction towards someone. How does it feel physically, and what thoughts and/or feelings do you experience? Also, do you consider chemistry and attraction to be the same or different? How?

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[-] captainlezbian@lemmy.world 5 points 2 years ago

A beautiful man is like a gorgeous painting to me. I don’t want to fuck that painting though, it’s just nice to look at. A beautiful woman on the other hand is like a massive meal after a fast. I’m filled with a consumptive desire influenced by the state of my body and my emotional experience. But ultimately it’s either my body taking the reins and telling me what I want, or me not being in the mood but knowing that’s what my body will want.

And it’s a multi sensory experience. Vision is nice, but omg scent, and touch, and the sound of her voice…

Chemistry is different. It’s the way you flow together. It acts as a multiplier. With good chemistry someone can go from somewhat attractive to very and bad chemistry can kill attraction. But it can’t make attraction from nothing.

this post was submitted on 20 Nov 2023
75 points (100.0% liked)

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