People who say “dead chat” are the dirt beneath my feet. Oh? Really? The chat is dead? Thanks for letting me know! I’m sure this acknowledgment will sprout life back into the chat at once.

Saying “dead chat” is a waste of metaphorical oxygen. You want to revive chat? Bring up how your bathroom has mold, that you got your sister pregnant, send a meme, send ANYTHING but “dead chat.” It does nothing but waste notifications and time.

I know I’m making a mountain out of a molehill, but I’ll die on that molehill.