I'll need to do more research before I can answer this fully. Off the top of my head:

• Yes, an MP can be suspended for less than ten days, but that doesn't imply MPs actually turn up every day. Suspension really just means they're not allowed to.
• The requirements for triggering a petition are defined by the Recall of MPs Act 2015, which also provides for a petition for MPs convicted of a crime and sentenced to a prison term of a certain length. I believe there's another condition too but I can't look that up right at this minute
• Recall elections are referendums asking if a representative should be recalled, right? We don't do that here; we go straight from a petition into a by-election. However, petitions cannot be started by the public, they are triggered automatically according to the RoMA2015
• Having the other parties running would give Farage what he wants. If he wins against other parties in this election, it gives him more political weight to argue against another by-election after the investigation concludes.
• Count Binface winning is more likely than usual, but basically not going to happen, unless turnout is low or the people of Clacton have had a change of heart since the last time I looked into this. Farage got 45% of the vote in the last general election [election of every seat in the HoC; I make this distinction because US generals happen in years divisible by 4when you guys elect the President as well as the House? We don't have midterms here], so it's more than likely he'll with with a huge percentage but less absolute votes. However, I wouldn't be surprised if Count Binface eats into his potential majority [margin of victory; as a mathematician, it annoys the hell out of me that we call the difference between first and second place a "majority"]
• Clacton-on-sea is a seaside town, not necessarily rural, but was in a much better state in the previous century. As far as I know, Clacton has been left behind by the political establishment and for decades, like many parts of the UK, and the people there are rightly pissed about it. However, to say it's equivalent to one of he small red states you mentioned is, IMO, a little reductive, but that's because I know about as much about these states that you do about Clacton

Again, stream of consciousness here. 100% accuracy is not guaranteed. This infodump was brought to you by Procrastination From Employment™.