Today I had a work call with a colleague who has been mentoring me for a few months now (nothing serious, just someone to ask now and then if I need advice). Around half way through this call, once they had answered my original question, out of the blue and unprompted they asked "wasp, have you considered that you might be neurodivergent?"
From the short conversation I then had, they have noticed that I hyperfocus, I can't organise for shit, I regularly stop mid sentence and change the subject, and that I bounce between trains of thought rapidly which makes it hard for people to keep up. I was a bit surprised as I don't work particularly closely with this colleague and while I'm aware that I do these things they have never really been mentioned before, and certainly not attributed to anything other than me being a bit overenthusiastic.
I won't delve too deeply here, but today has certainly been a day of self reflection. Regardless of whether I am or am not neurodivergent, I have always felt able to pass as neurotypical and today has been the first time I have had anyone question this. Suddenly I'm thinking that maybe I should be taking the possibility of me having ADHD a lot more seriously. The penny has finally dropped that I need to get this checked out.
Any advice on what I should do next? I've booked in to see my doctor, but what would you all recommend to a potential ADHD newcomer?
My partner was also the one who suggested that might have ADHD. It sort of made sense to at least try since I'd been struggling with being "normal" since I was about 8, so I gave it a shot.
So I got diagnosed last year as an adult. Getting diagnosed doesn't immediately change anything (well, no shit), but it can help you be better informed when developing systems to make your life more functional.
For example, having things you need to do a task close by on hand. By having a small trash can on my desk, compared to just a bigger bin on the other side of my room, I no longer pile up trash on my desk forever before throwing it away once I run out of room.
In regards to medication, if you've managed to make it this far and hold down a job like me, you're likely to be prescribed some short acting medication to start for days you really need to get things done.
I have inattentive type ADHD and I take Ritalin 10mg only on days I need to either get a lot of work done, or when I have long meetings to attend because I struggle to stay awake when I'm unengaged.
Before this was all suggested to me, I honestly thought I was narcoleptic because I was always such a sleepy person when I'm bored. It took having a mutual friend get diagnosed for my partner to realise similarities, and then me getting diagnosed to realise that the friends I attract tend to be "different" themselves.
My parents continue to refuse to acknowledge that I'm anything but neurotypical, which had made my younger years a lot harder than I wished it could've been.
The diagnosis just helped me be more aware about the specific challenges I have to face, like task paralysis, or the compulsive filling in I do when a friend pauses too long in the middle of a sentence, or how I struggle to remember things when I get distracted. The ADHD was always a part of you, but now you can find life hack tips that actually work!
Best wishes, from a fellow late-diagnosed person :)
Thank you for this - I can relate to this and it's reassuring to know I'm not alone!
Especially with parents. My parents are, in my opinion, both textbook cases of undiagnosed ADHD (especially compulsiveness and hyperfocus). Yet they are both against any form of label that might define you as "different". Not in an oppressive way, more a "Does it matter? You are who you are regardless” way. It's probably not been helpful for them or myself and may explain why I've always tried to ignore signs to "be normal" and not ask for or seek support.
Two of them? Bless you. In the midst of my dad telling me that "You're not special, everyone has the same problems with falling asleep in class, me included", I realised my grandmother also had some traits and that it was likely hereditary.
The stigma around mental health was heavy "back in their day". While I don't fault them for their aversion to it, my mother's blatant nonacceptance for my diagnosis despite herself now taking medication for anxiety has been a sore spot for me.