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submitted 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) by Kyrgizion@lemmy.world to c/goodoffmychest@lemmy.world

I just realized the following:

-I am the first in my extended family to have a tertiary education. My parents and grandparents were laborers.

-Despite having two degrees, I've never been able to use either of them

-I spent the next twenty years working various customer service jobs while never actually rising through the ranks.

-Today I'm over 40 and looking at living paycheck to paycheck until the day I die or retire. No-one in my generation with half a brain expects retirement to just, y'know, be there when it's our turn. All of us are waking up to the reality that despite paying into SS for our entire working lives, we will never get even a fraction of what we put in back.

Given these circumstances, how am I supposed to convince my son to continue his education when he's finished with high school? I feel like a liar already for trying to convince him that if he just works hard at something it'll eventually pay off, because I have seen firsthand that this just isn't true?

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[-] TheCriticalMember@aussie.zone 1 points 1 week ago

Bit of an unusual situation with 3 phases. The first phase is a long and complicated story involving an overbearing father who told me I'd be a loser if I didn't follow the path he decided for me. I tried it but didn't want it, so ended up dropping out of uni and working in construction, which is what I loved since the time I was born. I was good at it and had many opportunities to advance, but because of his pressure and manipulation I didn't take them, I was kind of stuck. Phase 2 - met a girl online at age 25 and moved to the USA to get married. No qualifications and a potential family so I went to uni while working full time and got a bachelor and master in comp sci and got into software development. That was the only good money time I've had. We bought a house and all the stuff to set up our lives, but it didn't last long enough. Phase 3 - In 2015 we decided to move back to Australia because of the path the US was on. I wasn't able to get work in software, saturated field and lots of people with more experience than I had. So I went back again and did the full time work/full time uni thing and got a degree in civil engineering while working a low paid job in utilities. So now I'm a civil engineer, in a good job, making what would have been pretty good money up until the last few years. But now it's just not enough. The cost of housing here in Australia is absurd, and more and more people are being pushed out of the market every day. I know it sounds narcissistic, but looking back over my life it kinda feels like the goalposts keep being moved specifically for me, because every time I think I'm going to be ok now, things just get harder. I'm making 60% more than I was 5 years ago and have less money than I did back then.

Anyway, that's the short version. Moving to a new continent twice surely didn't help, but I'm glad I did it both times. Since moving back to Australia I've often wondered if it was the right choice, but I haven't wondered that even once since last November.

this post was submitted on 22 Sep 2025
54 points (100.0% liked)

Off My Chest

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