So, I've been getting back into gaming in a big way these last few months, after a low back injury left me sidelined from my other, more physically active hobbies.
The silver lining (or I suppose cat nip) for my ASD brain is modding. In the past 6 weeks, I've modded a ds, a dsi, a wii u, a wii (which underrated as a "turn it on and play the classics" machine), several Android TVs... yeah...
While I've loved all of them (the Wii especially brought me great joy), I wished there was a way to play everything in one spot. A curated console, as it were.
Of course, you know where this is going - emulation.
Through the wonders of Ebay, I was able go score a Lenovo M93p tiny for around $80USD (a SFF pc from around 2014, about same dimensions as wii).
Throw in a faster processor, lobotomise windows, throw on Playnite, Dolphin Emulator and a bunch of personal classic and... well...let me introduce you to my SuperPretendo 5 :)
PS: ChatGPT gen art (and typos aside), I kinda love what it came up with for this.
Made the following along the lines of the old SEGA ads back in the day, then ran it thru ChatGPT for formatting help.
Hope this ok to share; just fun / not trying to AI spam / posting here for enjoyment.
Super Pretendo 5 — Retro Reinvented
Front of Box
Logo: Super Pretendo 5™ Tagline: Don’t spend $80 to play Mario Kart. Do more with less.
Hero art: Rico parachuting in JC2 + Mario Kart Wii chaos.
Badges:
Back of Box
Headline: Your old games. New life. One tiny box.
Features:
🎮 Console Feel – Couch-ready, controller-first, TV-native.
🧠 Smart Power – i7-4785T + Intel HD 4600 wrung dry for HD.
📦 Backlog Optimized & Upscaled – Super Mario Sunshine, Mario Kart, Shadow of the Colossus, Fallout 3, Just Cause 2 … and many more
✨ Switch Modes:
Crunchy Mode → Wii-like smoothness @ 60 FPS.
Cinematic Mode → 1366p sharper fidelity.
🔧 Thrift Engineered – A$200 (~US$130) total build cost → complete console-like system.
≈ 3× cheaper than PS5 / Xbox Series X (~A$800).
The Prestige Collection(TM)
PC Ports Tested & Couch Ready on the Super Pretendo 5
60 FPS Locked
Portal 2
Deus Ex: Human Revolution
Dead Rising 2
Assassin’s Creed II
Superhot
Firewatch
Half-Life 2
Mass Effect 2
30+ FPS
Metal Gear Solid V
Grand Theft Auto IV
Bayonetta
Fallout 4
Witcher 2
Bioshock Infinite
Dishonored
Prey
… and many more
Special Note
Just Cause 2 → Crunchy Mode: Locked 60 FPS @ 960×540 (VSync on — 84 FPS with VSync off). Cinematic Mode: ~45 FPS @ 1366×768.
Screenshots Panel
Mario Kart Wii — native vs. 2× IR
Just Cause 2 — 60 FPS wingsuit chaos
Fallout 3 — Remastered & Upscaled, 60 FPS
Fine Print
Super Pretendo 5™ is a DIY build. Capable of playing thousands of retro titles + select modern/indie games from the 2015–2025 era, including Superhot, Firewatch, Stanley Parable: Ultra Deluxe, Cult of the Lamb, and more.
Thousands of 6th gen console classics at 2× upscale. Prestige ports tested for couch play.
Comparison Chart
System Cost (AUD)
Footer Slogan
“Don’t spend $80 to play Mario Kart again. Do more with less.”
You’re not trying to AI spam; you succeeded Ike a pro.
And I hate it.
Come on, man, this could have been an easy job in GIMP or PhotoShop and it would have looked better too.
Sorry my dude. I don't have that skillset. Would be handy. Will work on it.
That skill set can also go on a resume and get you paid well. You’ve got this and I genuinely believe in you.
Heh...it's a little late for a career change...
But I'll add it to the list :)