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this post was submitted on 24 Aug 2025
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No Stupid Questions
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No such thing. Ask away!
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Is that the case, because they are men, or because they are afraid?
Piggybacking on thsi comment: it's incredibly rare for men to get approached, it's incredibly common for women to get approached.
Both of these situations have downsides, but right now we are talking about men, so let's ignore the downsides for women right now.
If you are the one who has to approach somebody if you want to start up any kind of relationship (from casual acquaintance to friend, to romantic relationship), that means you will be on the receiving end of rejection, by definition. If you are in the "approaching" role, and you'd reject somebody, you just don't approach them. So by definition, it's quite rare when being approached that you are rejected by the person who approached you.
So while women have to reject a lot of approaches they don't want, men get rejected quite often. A socially inept woman is a wallflower, a socially inept man is a creep.
If you have been rejected too often (and maybe too harshly), this might easily turn into a sour grapes situation ("I can't do social interaction, so I don't want social interaction") due to fear of rejection.