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Contra A Review Of Dating Men In The Bay Area
(thingofthings.substack.com)
Women only trans inclusive This is an inclusive community for all things women. Whether you're here for make up tips, feminism or just friendly chit chat, we've got you covered.
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There are too many men and too few women on lemmy for this to work. Men frequently out-ratio us simply because of numbers, they derail our posts, and they speak loudly and often on topics they have no understanding of. This is a place where we expect people to be women+, and this changes what we are comfortable talking about and how we respond to each other. Means we can talk freely in a way we can't otherwise. In theory a few men offering their perspective once in a while is fine, but in practice that's not what happens.
For example imagine we discuss an injustice we experience because of our gender, and then men show up to defend themselves in large numbers by commenting and derailing; belittling us and dismissing our concerns. Why would we then try to discuss injustices ever again? If we can't be safe here? We could remove men on a case by case basis, but sometimes you want a women only space because of the expectations this sets and the safety it creates.
I don't really see the issue in making a safe space? Have you read about safe spaces before? They are sometimes necessary.
I disagree that banning men is the same thing as a safe space. If there is a something in particular that men tend to be doing when they post which you dislike, that should be the thing which is banned -- and that's what makes the space safe. For instance, if they say something misogynistic, then yeah, ban. I can't say for sure from experience, but I would imagine for the mods it's easier to recognize something bannable which is inherent to the comment than it is to figure out whether or not a poster is male.
Tree structured forums are by their nature robust to the "derailing" problem IMO. If there's a comment which you find to be derailing the conversation... simply fold that comment, and all responses to it will disappear from your screen.