real :'(

True, these are valid problems.

Here is how I do it and yes I know I am very privileged.

1. Have a DISCORD with everyone who might attend in it.
2. Pick 3-4 dates at least a month in advanced. Have people list witch dates work for them. Pick the one with the most open spots.
3. Tell my work building supervisor that I want to use our training room for a LAN party (We have a good history of this and it brings in other coworkers. So like team building stuff).
4. (Optional but effective and makes it seems like you have a plan) Draw up a tentative schedule with which games you are playing and how long you are going to be playing. Add Chill Time/Extension time in case people want a break between games or want to play more.

Good Luck!

I bowed out of a friend's recent LAN bc every time they just play Halo and Age of Mythology and they're all super good at both and I'm terrible at both (and not interested in playing either game tbh).

Maybe it’s not everyone, but at 37 I feel much less interested in socializing in the first place.

Sorry, I can't make it. But only because I have no fucking idea why I agreed to it in the first place...