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A life-changing shift to my approach has been to worry about absolute amounts rather than percentages. Saving $10 on a $20 item feels great but ultimately is the same thing as saving $10 on a $500 item (which feels like nothing).
I grew up lower middle class: never had to worry about not having a roof over my head, but there were times we were somewhat food insecure, and spending money on leisure/entertainment or anything unnecessary for survival was a foreign concept until I got to high school and some my parents' career moves paid off and put us in upper middle class. It took them a good 10+ years before they could relax a little bit and feel secure with their money, though, and that was as much driven by the fact that their kids were adults who had moved out.
So life has been about deciding which of my parents' frugal attitudes and approaches to money to keep and which to discard.
Things I decided not to adopt:
Things I kept:
Things I had to learn on my own:
I've also made a shitload of mistakes, some of them pretty costly, especially back in my 20's:
I'm rich now, most of it from luck (especially timing), much of it from personal relationships (good family, good marriage, good friends), some of it from actual effort (good grades from a good law school), and some of it from conscious decisions to steer towards my strengths and away from my weaknesses (lazy but smart, prototypical "gifted" slacker with undiagnosed ADHD).
It took a while to get here, though, and I was financially insecure well into my 30's. Sorta figured shit out then, and then married someone who complements me pretty well on these things, and covers my blind spots.
I have some savings, and it's an emergency fund. It's representing 1-2 months of typical spending, that could be stretched to 3-4 months if I needed to stop the frivolous spending. But I have credit beyond that, and less liquid assets I'd be able to tap into if I were facing a longer term issue.
But I'm not saving for any particular thing other than retirement. If things accumulate and grow, great. I'll make a judgment call on when to retire based on how I feel and how much I have and what I want to do. I anticipate my wife and I will probably want to retire in our early 60's, based on our anticipated career trajectories and the ages of our children.
Really interesting read. Thanks for the response.
Why do you only have a few months' worth of savings despite considering yourself rich? Or are you just speaking about cash reserves?
Yes. Cash reserves are like unused RAM to me: I have it, so I might as well put it to work. If it turns out I need it somewhere else, I can always go rearrange things to make that possible.
Realistically, I think I'm rich because my wife and I both have strong ability to command high salaries, switch jobs, etc., even in a pretty severe downturn. The main things that might tank the value of that expected future cash flow are disability or death, and we at least insure against those.
We also only need one of our two incomes to support our lifestyle, so we have a certain resilience that just comes from having that buffer. At our current ages, we also already have substantial retirement savings, so we have some resilience there, too.
The but about higher income making it easier to have mistakes is a big one.
I have a friend online who wants to make money, but doesn't seem to have the ability to do so without going back to school. Going back to school would incur student loan debt, so they do not wish to do so.
I have a crazy amount of student loan debt, maybe $150k. But people don't understand that federal student loan debt is absolutely nothing like credit card debt. There are basically no downsides to it besides paying another monthly bill (that you can use an income based repayment plan for).
People don't understand how incredibly useful excess income is even if it ends up with a lot of loan debt. I had a similar hesitancy back before I went back to school, but I don't regret it at all. I think I ended up like tripling my income.
Even if you end up with a lot of loans, making say $80k/yr is astronomically easier to survive on than $40k/yr for example. You have to think that something like rent or food prices are going to be somewhat similar in your area no matter how much you make. Sure, you could choose to live in a lavish place I suppose, but if you live reasonably then it's more than worth it.
As an example, the average rent price for a not shitty one bedroom apartment in my area is maybe around $1.6k, which would equate to $19.2k/yr. That's almost 50% of the gross income of the person making $40k/yr while only around 25% of the person making $80k/yr. So even if the person making $80k/yr has a $1k/mo student loan bill (you can get it cheaper if you wish), the difference is dramatic.
The person making $40k/yr will have a little over $20k left over at the end of the year for remaining expenses and savings, but the person making $80k/yr will have more than double that at $48k left over. Obviously there are a lot of nuances in this but still.
So it's absolutely worth it to incur federal student loan debt if it means you will make a lot more more money. Private loan debt is a bit different.
Yeah, I'm not going to pretend like I'm good with money. I'm not. I have a decade of experience of being a young adult on a tight budget to know that's not one of my strengths. I wasn't great at stretching each dollar to its most efficient use. And I still am not.
I won't speak on whether student loans are worth it. I think, like everything, it depends. I think a bachelor's degree is definitely worth the cost (both in tuition and time), but it might still be worth doing it cheaper if there's a cheaper path available.