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What is the most unhelpful advice you have received?
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The double-edged anxiety for any given responsibility thing is an ADHD thing? Ah heck.
Yepp, or at least a subgroup of it and/or autism.
And if you're really "lucky" it turns into PDA, "pathological demand avoidance" or as I prefer to call it "pervasive drive for autonomy". Worst case you enter fight or flight mode due to any demands on you. My feeling is that it's a understandable reaction to the feelings of anxiety demands have pushed on you over the years.