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submitted 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) by flicker@kbin.social to c/youshouldknow@lemmy.world

YSK: Just because something is easy for you, does not mean that it is easy.

ETA; Why you should know; everyone has natural talents, everyone has skills they developed with practice or over time. Something that feels easy to you might be difficult for someone else to grasp, or they might have a different background or a different way of doing things. When you show someone else how to do something, or when you ask someone else to do something, you need to set aside your expectations on how they might do that thing, or how quickly, or how well.

Be patient. Understand not everyone comes naturally to every new skill or new talent. Some people have learning disabilities or just a lack of familiarity with skills you consider "basic." And try not to belittle someone for needing extra time to master something you find "simple" or they may never try again!

Edit2: Kind of like how I can't figure out how to edit this to save my life. I've been belittled in the past for being bad at things so my instinct was to delete this, but seeing all the conversation, I couldn't bring myself to do it! Consider me a lesson in action!

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[-] ttmrichter@lemmy.world 99 points 1 year ago

What you say: It's easy!

What you (hopefully) mean: Don't be intimidated! You can do it!

What they hear: You must be stupid if you can't do this.


What you say: It's so simple even a child can figure it out!

What you (hopefully) mean: Calm down and work through it. You've got this.

What they hear: Even a child is smarter than you!


Keep in mind that if you're dealing with someone who is struggling it is self-evidently not easy for them. Claiming that it is invalidates their experience and makes them feel small and stupid. Don't do that.

What you should say: I get it. This can be pretty intimidating. Let's work through this together.

It really is that simple.

[-] darkmatterstyx@lemmy.fmhy.ml 14 points 1 year ago

What I have learned to say is "I understand this is new and confusing; however, don't stress out, I was probably more confused than you are when I first learned this." It throws them off a bit, because they think you're the expert, and it clicks that you had to learn it too. If they probe deeper into why it was hard for me, I explain that I'm so used to how things are supposed to work, I have to step back and see how things can work.

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this post was submitted on 15 Jul 2023
389 points (100.0% liked)

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