It absolutely sucks that this happened to you, I would literary not wish your fate on anybody in the world. I won't use this to tell my own sob story, but have you tried getting into video games? Most have accessibility features. Get "Factorio" it basically runs on a potato and you will unironicaly forget what the sun looks like. Sound is not important either.

I'm sorry for your loss of the lifestyle you cherished. Just a random thought: If hearing aids won't work for you, you could try feeling music instead of hearing it, while it won't be the same, sensing the underlying beat could help evoke your imagination again and possibly help you rediscover your favourite tunes and new ones.

Definitely the internet is a mixed bag, with lots of doom and gloom, and more cynical and controversial takes elevated to the top. There are also corners of the internet that are positive, definitely go visit them more. Reading fiction and learning from non-fiction literature may be more of a personal comfort than the internet may be.

You have had a major loss.

I’m glad you are still with us to share this story. You wrote in such a clear and eloquent way; it’s clear you cared very much about us that you took the time to communicate effectively.

My father is currently in a nursing home (just for normal end of life stuff). He was a deadbeat most of my life and treated his health really poorly.

It’s cruel that he was able to live the way he did and live for so long, while you’ve done nothing to “earn” your maladies; yet, you’re both in a similar situation (except no one wants to go see him, because of him being a PoS for most of his life). You don’t seem like a deadbeat or a PoS, so as far as I’m concerned, you win.

I hope things turn around completely for you and you’re restored back to full health.

Nothing but feels for you friend, that's rough and I can't imagine what it must be like. I too am coming to grips with my own disabilities, a spine injury putting me into a wheelchair. Losing a sense on top of everything else you mentioned is horrific.

If I may be so bold, I found a lot of peace, zen and understanding in the book "What doesn't kill you". I recently finished and it was incredibly gratifying to read about how other people struggle with life changing medical events.

Knowing anything about it I have to ask.... would bone conducting headphones work?

There are corners of the Internet still out there where you can find some really great people to hang out with; like 70% of my friend group is people who all meet through online games. We get together in person weekly or so now but still regularly play games together and hang out. I know it's no replacement for all you've lost, but maybe playing games with friends could be some comfort? Or some other hobby or interest group that can be engaged with online?

I don’t know your circumstances, or what you’ve tried or can try, but you could look into cochlea implants.

And while nothing about this is ideal or easy, I hope you are able to find your way to heal and rebuild from this trauma. Grieve. You’ve lost a lot. But please don’t give up on yourself (or your wife) quite yet.

That's just rotten luck. You feel like your life has ended, and I can see why. But it hasn't. There's more strength in you than you know, even still.

If you have a favorite song, have you tried going to a lyrics site and imagining the song as you read? It's not as good as the real thing, but maybe it's a way to keep those songs alive in your heart.

Fucking sucks but it was impactful to read your story. I’m guessing you’re properly deep in the supplement community, but if you want to chat about them lmk

I’m so sorry to hear that. I don’t really have any advice but you’ll be in my thoughts OP, I hope you get better