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I'm quitting again!
(sh.itjust.works)
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this post was submitted on 20 Aug 2023
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Hey I hope you're still going strong! I would love to hear an update from you, no matter how it's going.
I'm just going on about two years myself, which I honestly thought was impossible. And before that I "practised" quitting for years and years. Sometimes I would quit for just 20 minutes and be right back at it after, haha. It almost feels like some kind of magic trick that I don't need nicotine anymore.
Anyway, there's no trick, except whatever works for you, and perseverance. Again and again, until it finally sticks. Eventually you too will be looking back over the years, and saying to someone else "oh yeah, I used to smoke, but managed to quit despite it seeming impossible. If I can do it, you can do it."
If I can do it, you can do it. :)
Unfortunately, I'm still smoking. I'm down to three cigarettes per day, though so it's much better than the 15-20 a day I used to smoke. I hope I can eventually quit completely, though, but it might take a while yet.
Hey 3 is a real milestone. Congrats! I remember sometimes I would try quitting just to get my number of daily cigarettes back down.
I hope you keep at it. If it helps, I started to thinking of my quitting like doing "reps" in a workout routine. I would try and skip just 1 cigarette at a time. The withdrawal was like "feeling the burn" - unpleasant yes, but ultimately good for me. You have good days and bad days, but after a while you get more used to swimming in that complex feeling of nicotine withdrawal; it begins to hold fewer surprises, and you're able to push further and further into it. Just like with exercise, you grow stronger with the practise.
My problem is I get really stressed out and unpleasant to be around when I cut down on cigarettes. it's tough on me but it really wears my wife down, because I get hissy with her and that's unfair. Even when I smoke 3 a day, I can't help behaving like a spoiled child. I need to work on that, but I don't know how. I don't mean to behave like that it's just that I'm stressed and jumpy as hell. And when you think about it, it makes sense that I act like a child having a hissy fit. I've literally taken away my own favorite passifyer.
Definitely not just a you problem. It's actually very relatable, and sadly, something I think we all have to go through.
I would get unpleasant and stupid, which was not amazing for my day job that involved daily meetings, and concentrating for hours at a time. The whole time I was worried I'd get fired for being so bad at my job. At one point my partner actually told me "go smoke" because I was being such an ass. I was happy to have "permission" to use, but it still made me feel, like you said, such a baby.
Anyway, when I did finally stop 100% I started it on a 1 week staycation, so I could get the absolutely worst part out of the way while I wasn't working. But after that it was all managing expectations. My partner knew what to expect by now, and I asked for grace while I went through the wringer. I told a couple close people at work what I was going through, so if I seemed off, that was why.
Even then I was not pleasant to be around, and there were probably entire days where my work output was close to 0. So when I failed, and had to deal with the shame of deciding whether to smoke in secret, or let people know I'd failed, it felt like I'd really lost a bit battle.
But you know, you just keep trying, and eventually it sticks.