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I swear it (lemmy.ml)
submitted 2 years ago by Facelikeapotato@lemmy.ml to c/shitposting@lemmy.ml
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[-] MrMamiya@feddit.de 57 points 2 years ago

Pick my kid up from daycare. She’s got a quarter strip of bacon. Holds it up to my mouth and when I go to bite shoves the whole thing into her mouth. You had a long run, I was struck down before she could form a burn into words.

[-] DocBlaze@lemmy.world 29 points 2 years ago

drop her right back off at daycare and drive home. she doesn't need you anymore, she's ready to face the world without help

this post was submitted on 11 Sep 2023
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