I trust my crap to update itself. Is that wrong?

I check and update them whenever I can. There is no reason not to.

more and more apps (primarily Google services, Social Media, ...) get shitty updates

Don't use them and switch to alternatives then!

I'm still on DOS.

You should update your phone appa every day for security reasons. At least the ones with internet connectivity.

On your computer, do the same for your system and for your web browser and other web-focused apps.

Every time there is a new version available for the most part.

I go to the changelog of the app or software to see what has changed, since I only use FOSS I also have a broad glance at the code. If I know that what I am updating won't cause trouble for what I am currently doing (ie. A depency update that is used during a time I need to compile a big project), I go ahead and update.

In the case of new features I am not keen on, I usually keep the current version I have (and make any self-update impossible for said app/software), see if there is any reputable forks or fork it myself to remove said features.

I have a minimal amount of apps and software and I handpicked all of them specifically so that they follow what I want them to do. If for whatever reason they stray and become something I'd rather not use at all, I remove/purge them.

Security is also very important (to me at least). Not updating because a feature is unpleasant is fine as long as the app is fairly recent and has no way of communicating to any other apps or have any internet access.

I update everything automatically except for Google Messages. Nothing has RCS so I can't kick this last bastion of google in my life yet. I set Google Messages to never update and uninstall all updates because if I dont it eventually can't read Google own work profile and my work contacts won't show an ID. I had to wipe the app data daily before I just said fuck it we won't have updates. Fucken garbage app by a so called tech giant who can't even work their own shit. Its been like this for at least 4 months.

Pretty much as soon as a stable release happens for software on my phone. On my PC it mostly depends (for not-games) how annoyingly the update popup is placed. If it tells me on startup "Now (including a restart of the program) or we'll remind you on next startup" I usually pick later because I want to work on that, e.g. PDF, immediately. By the time I did the work, I either forgot about updating (repeat cycle next time I use it) or the manual update option is somewhere too obscurely placed and I'm too lazy to find out where.

One of my programs - I think it's Foxit PDF reader - offers an option to run the update when I close it. That's so lovely, because it allows me to do my work now and when I'm done, I can let it update in peace while I start something different.

Edit: Because I read Win10 in the comments: For OS updates, I carefully vet the major releases. I stayed on my XP until Win 7 released and was actually an improvement. Then I only upgraded to Win 10 when I acknowledged it as good and because Sea of Thieves wouldn't run on Win 7. Currently I'm trying to stay as far away from Win 11 as I can. We use it at work and I wouldn't want to bring this peril into my home.

Daily, with 256gb internal storage and SD card support, I have plenty of space

Only when I feel like it. And OS updates that require a reboot maybe four times a year. And I run pro audio software that takes a long time to catch up, so never the new whiz bang version of macOS. And never the N.0.0 version for any of my other devices. I used to work / dogfood development software for work. Never again. It’s begging for your existence to be hell.

I update whenever it is convenient or pushed. On Android it's not really a decision that I make, it just updates whenever it feels like it and so far I haven't disagreed very often. On my desktop I update Arch pretty much weekly, and Windows as little as possible because it wants to restart during the updating process and will probably just pull in more spyware. My Ubuntu laptop isn't used often, so it doesn't get updated often either. I also sometimes use some Fedora machines, which I also don't update too regularly.

Ubuntu and the multiple Fedora machines under my control also like to start unattended updates at the worst possible moments, which regularly interrupts my attempts to update or install stuff. I prefer to turn that shit off at every opportunity. I'd rather just get a notification that it wants me to update in the DE or terminal

When I remember to

Multiple times a day. It’s a bit of a dopamine addiction.

Laptop and phone: nearly every day.

Android: no clue, F-Droid started updating my apps automatically after an OS update, which is nice. My phone isn't rooted either. Linux: About once a week.

Mobile: I update one app a day (the one that's been waiting the longest) and check for system updates once a day. I install them as soon as I get them. Desktop: I run Debian testing and upgrade all my packages once a day

Phone: Monthly updates

Linux: Weekly updates

Android: 1-2 times per week, according to updates on gplay and F-droid
Win11: Once per month. OS, driver, app updates etc
Linux: Once per month. Once per two months, if I don't open it often.

I like updates of some apps and look forward to them.
Especially those of Collabora office, Newpipe/Pipepipe, Jerboa, Infinity, VLC, MPV, Firefox, Sumatrapdfviewer and similar cool apps.

But I understand the internet issue. It's mostly 3G mobile internet for me.

My Linux laptop is set to check for updates daily, which I then apply manually when I notice the tray icon. I sometimes procrastinate when it comes to reboots though.

My Android phone is on auto-update, which seems to mean whenever it's being charging for a few hours (so typically when charging overnight). Because the battery is still pretty good and I don't need to charge daily, that comes down to once every 2-3 nights or so.

My personal Linux servers (which run my self-hosted apps) are configured to automatically apply all updates (and reboot if necessary afterwards) at the time of day I'm most likely to be awake and available to manually fix stuff if anything goes wrong. The Docker-containers that run on them mostly get auto-updated to the latest version every 6 hours by Watchtower. A few containers have more cautious policies though, ranging from pinning a major version (but auto-upgrading to new minor versions within that) to pinning a specific version and at most sending a notification if there's an update. The latter is limited to stuff that has broken before and/or where newer releases are known to be buggy or incompatible.

When it comes to major updates (i.e. new distro releases) of my Linux machines, I typically wait about a month before upgrading because I've been bitten by release-day bugs before.