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some learn it in order to survive. others learn it to control situations - you can control how you react to things, which disarms lots of aggression/bullying. its even stronger to not actually get sad or angry when its justifiable, as cooler heads more often prevail. to wear your heart on your sleeve is a luxury afforded to the safe people.
I disagree that it's a luxury. Many people, especially autistic people, simply cannot learn this skill and they can suffer for it greatly.
i get your perspective and thank you for sharing. i posit that if their circumstances are traumatizing enough, those many people would reroute their brains to compartmentalize. its a luxury that they hadn't had to. it's not a 'skill' that is "learned" in a typical fashion. theres no school book for it.