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[CW: Mentions of Transphobia] Persecutor is causing our host to disappear, what to do? (pawb.social)
submitted 1 year ago by FlowerTree@pawb.social to c/plural@lemm.ee
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[Content Warning: mentions of transphobia]

Long story short, our persecutor have been trying to repress our transfem host, to the point where she rarely fronted nowadays. Maybe it was internalized transphobia, which sometimes caused us quite a problem.

While she's not the only transfem in our system, I couldn't help but to feel bad that she might felt unwelcome here, in her only safe space. She's also pretty empty and unresponsive ever since she started to disappear.

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[-] amlietra 1 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

Hello, bit new here, and i want first to say that the advice may not be applicable, sorry(each system is different, and fonction différently) Maybe the advice i would give is to try to disamorce the root of the persecutor's transphobia, ans if that does not work to try to make your système safe for your Host(for exemple by requesting that the persecutor goes dormant until they clear out their transphobia) It is not uncommon that persecutor have an goal to protect the system, but in a way that does not work, or doesn't work anymore(not uncommon but not Always). Maybe explaining to the persecutor that what they does actively put thé system in danger could help

I think one of the main issue is that actually, thé system is not a place where the host is safe,so i think asking for the Host to front more won't solve this, Hoping that helps Amélie

Ps: i used neutral for the persecutor's pronouns bc i wasn't sure which one was theirs, but when/if i know theirs, i will change them

[-] FlowerTree@pawb.social 1 points 1 year ago

I suppose it does make sense considering how unfriendly our system could become lately. We've tried our best to sort that, it is fortunate that most other system members don't support transphobia, so hopefully things will get better for us.

this post was submitted on 01 Aug 2023
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