415

I'm going Orange. I feel like all of the others would naturally follow.

(page 2) 50 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[-] SabinStargem@lemmy.today 10 points 3 days ago

Tirana. Being a courier, you can just zap yourself from South America or Australia straight to Albania to securely deliver a package or message. Provided your contracts cover the costs of the non-teleportation aspects, you can make millions easily.

load more comments (5 replies)
[-] realitista@lemmus.org 19 points 3 days ago

Cantonese speaking dog is the obvious choice. Far more impressive than anything else here.

[-] ramenshaman@lemmy.world 10 points 3 days ago

I would 1000% learn Cantonese and have conversations with my dog.

load more comments (2 replies)
load more comments (1 replies)
[-] GenosseFlosse@feddit.org 10 points 3 days ago

Easy: Teleport to Albania for cheap rent and food, work somewhere with high pay.

load more comments (2 replies)
[-] Jolteon@lemmy.zip 8 points 3 days ago

The black pill is the logical one to take. It's basically a get out of death (or jail, I suppose) free card if you can use it at the right time. Unfortunately, most people don't speak the language or have a passport that would allow them to leave the country. So you might have problems there.

Changing eye color at will would be cool as well, but not as useful in an emergency.

[-] Avicenna@programming.dev 6 points 3 days ago

One needs to read terms and conditions. Where in Tirana?

load more comments (1 replies)
[-] paranoia@feddit.dk 2 points 2 days ago

Quite a lot of Albanians speak English these days, I think you would be completely fine in basically every circumstance assuming you could open a safety deposit box and leave a spare passport.

load more comments (3 replies)
[-] regedit@lemmy.zip 6 points 3 days ago

Give me dat blue pill and drop me in Schism. Those weird clay people look like they know how to party!

[-] halvar@lemy.lol 13 points 3 days ago

My reactions in order upon seeing these:

"Sounds cool I could probably convince some nutjobs that I'm a demon or something?"

"Who?"

"Great my head already doesn't fit through my doorframe as it is"

"I would farm exactly two reactions out of this before getting bored"

"Who?"

"Is he only like ethnically cantonese or is that the sole language he speaks?"

"So nothing"

"A what in a what now?"

"Oh no."

load more comments (2 replies)
[-] victorz@lemmy.world 6 points 3 days ago

Red pill,I guess 🤷‍♂️

[-] mkhopper@lemmy.world 14 points 3 days ago

Obviously pink.
I don't see any stipulation that says I can only use my power only once.

[-] unepelle@mander.xyz 6 points 3 days ago

ITT: a lot of people who don't commit crimes because they're afraid they'd get caught instead of, you know, ethics.

Getting a speaking dog is so amazingly superior it's not even funny

load more comments (1 replies)
[-] bennypr0fane@discuss.tchncs.de 5 points 3 days ago

TOOL? QB, XFL? (Luol Deng?) Are those Chinese abbreviations (and celebrity)?

[-] exasperation@lemmy.dbzer0.com 3 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago)

Xijinping Football League

load more comments (1 replies)
[-] BarbecueCowboy@lemmy.dbzer0.com 8 points 3 days ago

Can't believe no one at all is thinking about 'Become a Third String QB in the XFL'. There's nothing specifying that this is a one time transformation.

Being an XFL QB of any level seems like it would require a general level of health and wellbeing... If you could assume that this would make you capable of being a QB with everything that would typically entail and if that power was constant where you were always capable of being a QB... You could be kind of immortal, healthy, and always in at least above average shape.

Also imagining a world where all society has collapsed except the XFL, I'd read that book.

load more comments (2 replies)
[-] randint@lemmy.frozeninferno.xyz 8 points 3 days ago

Going for purple to get the dog. I speak Mandarin, so if I put in the effort I could learn Cantonese really fast.

[-] hellfire103@lemmy.ca 13 points 3 days ago

Black could be handy once in a while.

[-] Gullible@sh.itjust.works 14 points 3 days ago

The vagueness gives me pause. You could effectively be a god depending on whether you can choose where and how to teleport within Tirana. Constructing buildings and shipping goods with minimal cost and energy. Renaming other towns to expand your powers. Expanding Albania to do the same. Definitely the highest ceiling

load more comments (4 replies)
[-] badcommandorfilename@lemmy.world 11 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago)

5 Dollarydoos!?

[-] frog_brawler@lemmy.world 5 points 3 days ago
load more comments (1 replies)
[-] rmuk@feddit.uk 8 points 3 days ago

Red. Rob a bank in a balaclava.

load more comments (1 replies)
[-] Bazell@lemmy.zip 9 points 3 days ago

Black one. You can earn a lot of money by being the fastest delivery agent.

[-] Localhorst86@feddit.org 13 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago)

You can only teleport to Tirana, not back

load more comments (2 replies)
[-] ChicoSuave@lemmy.world 9 points 3 days ago

Love the idea that a third string QB in the XFL is worth $5 AUD. Still overvalued.

load more comments
view more: ‹ prev next ›
this post was submitted on 28 Nov 2025
415 points (100.0% liked)

memes

18186 readers
2729 users here now

Community rules

1. Be civilNo trolling, bigotry or other insulting / annoying behaviour

2. No politicsThis is non-politics community. For political memes please go to !politicalmemes@lemmy.world

3. No recent repostsCheck for reposts when posting a meme, you can only repost after 1 month

4. No botsNo bots without the express approval of the mods or the admins

5. No Spam/Ads/AI SlopNo advertisements or spam. This is an instance rule and the only way to live. We also consider AI slop to be spam in this community and is subject to removal.

A collection of some classic Lemmy memes for your enjoyment

Sister communities

founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS