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Good morning. (lemmy.world)
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[-] FartsWithAnAccent@fedia.io 173 points 9 months ago

His mistake: She's clearly a keeper.

[-] Frozengyro@lemmy.world 80 points 9 months ago
[-] FartsWithAnAccent@fedia.io 68 points 9 months ago

"When she stole my nose, she also stole my heart."

[-] magnetosphere@fedia.io 110 points 9 months ago

He has no sense of humor. Not a loss in any way.

[-] Klear@sh.itjust.works 6 points 9 months ago

Definitely not. It would need three more frames.

[-] RangerJosey@lemmy.ml 92 points 9 months ago

Jokes on you im into that shit.

[-] disguy_ovahea@lemmy.world 54 points 9 months ago

You’re such a brownnoser.

[-] random_character_a@lemmy.world 78 points 9 months ago

Don't care about bumhole or the pinch, but I'd propose instantly due to the humor.

[-] thurstylark@lemm.ee 38 points 9 months ago

Exaaaactly this. If you can't laugh at yourself and me while we're naked doing fun things, idk how much fun you're having, really.

[-] gofsckyourself@lemmy.world 71 points 9 months ago

I remade this meme in a different format because the stupid p*say thing and the dumb pic

[-] pixeltree 16 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago)

Thanks, the sanitization of the internet is really driving me crazy. Not worth complaining about but I'm happy you made this and will be something I'll try to do in the future

[-] gofsckyourself@lemmy.world 6 points 9 months ago

I was on mobile, so I used this tool:
https://threadfaker.com/

But it would be more convincing if you just use browser dev tools to edit the content of a real post.

[-] bitjunkie@lemmy.world 3 points 9 months ago

But won't someone think of the poor ad revenue

[-] Aceticon@lemmy.dbzer0.com 14 points 9 months ago

"He was licking my balls from behind and his nose accidentally touched my butthole, so in clenched my cheeks and said 'got your nose Donald' and he kept coming back for more"

[-] dan@upvote.au 6 points 9 months ago

Is this Elon Musk but on Threads? lol

[-] FelixCress@lemmy.world 56 points 9 months ago

That's actually hilarious, apart from idiotic censorship of "pussy".

[-] bcgm3@lemmy.world 30 points 9 months ago
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[-] psmgx@lemmy.world 53 points 9 months ago

You got his nose but he's got pink eye

[-] FartsWithAnAccent@fedia.io 27 points 9 months ago

That's why you wear goggles, duh.

[-] IndiBrony@lemmy.world 26 points 9 months ago
[-] Viking_Hippie@lemmy.dbzer0.com 15 points 9 months ago

Here, have the visual version 🙂

[-] aeronmelon@lemmy.world 48 points 9 months ago

He’s mad because she never gave it back.

[-] carotte 45 points 9 months ago

what the hell is happening to the censored text at the top

[-] Johanno@feddit.org 28 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago)

pussy - > p*ssy - > p*say - > p yay!

[-] carotte 47 points 9 months ago
[-] JustARegularNerd@lemmy.world 7 points 9 months ago

It's clearly a complete the CAPTCHA challenge.

Please enter the word you see above

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[-] dylanmorgan@slrpnk.net 35 points 9 months ago

If a woman did that to me I’d propose on the spot.

[-] BonesOfTheMoon@lemmy.world 15 points 9 months ago

Well it's been a while, wink wink.

[-] dylanmorgan@slrpnk.net 9 points 9 months ago

Oh my, now I’m blushing.

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[-] Bgugi@lemmy.world 5 points 9 months ago

I mean, I think the described action counts as a proposal....

She was probably on (at least) one knee and she put a ring on it...

[-] secret300@lemmy.sdf.org 34 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago)

Bro if a girl did this to me I'd never leave

[-] AeonFelis@lemmy.world 51 points 9 months ago

Well, yea. You won't be able to, seeing how she holds your nose.

[-] mojofrododojo@lemmy.world 4 points 9 months ago

Tycho Brahe wouldn't be phased.

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[-] Gullible@sh.itjust.works 34 points 9 months ago

Balls are a fellator’s shield against unintentionally playing the back nine, and I'm insulted that god gave them to only half of us.

[-] mojofrododojo@lemmy.world 10 points 9 months ago

as the scrotum is easily the ugliest body part, bar none, for either sex, I gotta disagree.

you can shave it, dress it up, put a bow on it, nothing's gonna change the fact that it's a shriveled sack of nuts.

[-] flicker@lemmy.dbzer0.com 10 points 9 months ago

There was a subreddit for people putting like outfits on their peckers, and that's about the only thing I think the fediverse is missing. And before anybody tells me to start that community, I don't have a dick of my own, and yes, I'm aware that it's a skill issue.

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[-] DmMacniel@feddit.org 32 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago)

Watch out she got his nose! *blam* *blam* *blam*

[-] Saltycracker@lemmy.world 13 points 9 months ago

A actual shitpost

[-] bane_killgrind@slrpnk.net 11 points 9 months ago

My wife loved this

[-] LongboardingLad@lemmy.world 10 points 9 months ago

Lowkey Wife material. That level of levity is super attractive

[-] hungryphrog 9 points 9 months ago

Worth it, he doesn't deserve you.

[-] cabron_offsets@lemmy.world 4 points 9 months ago

Love chowin box from behind like that. What a view.

[-] omega_x3@lemmy.world 4 points 9 months ago

Sometimes she can almost hear him calling her name and saying please let go

[-] BenLeMan@lemmy.world 4 points 9 months ago

More like "pnease net go". 😅

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this post was submitted on 16 Feb 2025
1192 points (100.0% liked)

Lemmy Shitpost

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