Spite and a need to see people get their just desserts

Hope? I have none. I continue on through the power of avoidance and denial. If I stop to think about things it turns into suicidal thoughts, so I just do my damnedest not to think.

Spite.

Tone down social media use and do a little prepping. Learn how to use mylar bags and properly store away rice, beans, lentils, pastas, etc.

Prep as if the internet is going down for a prolonged time, maybe even electricity in general.

You can stress about things after you've gotten your shit together for a prolonged emergency.

Understand that this isn't the end of the world, just the end of the world as we know it. Humans are notoriously lazy and selfish, it will take a worldwide calamity before we get our collective shit together and do what's right.

The people in charge have failed us for their own selfish interests. There's nothing else to do except prep and make a better tomorrow.

Curiosity, so I observe. I believe we have control over nothing and that free will is an illusion. Consciousness is a mystery, as much my own as the one I suppose others have. In the middle of the chaos, I sometimes see glimpses of beauty, in many forms: music, images, people's behaviour, fiction, maths, nature... So I observe , I try to find patterns, to understand how things work, why others do what they do. I have found beauty in the very little things, what used to be chores I now enjoy, they were chores because "I thought I had better more important things to do", I wanted to be "later" but now I know what matters is to live in the moment, and I'll be living the next moment later.

Social media, the news, they are trying to grab your attention and project you to the future, what is the next threat, when are you likely to die or suffer. The truth is: we are all going to be dead eventually, it can be for many reasons, it can be in the next hour, or in thousands of years, we cannot know when, but we all know it will happen, doesn't really help to worry too much about it.

Don't waste your life trying to prevent your inevitable death. Enjoy it while you can. The rest is mostly out of your control anyway.

What’s hope got to do with it? You survive. That’s it.

But for real, because my people have endured persecution before. As I look at our incoming persecution I see that we got further this time than in a long time and so we must endure and survive and go further again.

But no matter what you survive

I have no hope, only fantasies that people will come to their senses someday. Hope? Nah.

When national politics goes to hell, think about your local community. If you and many of the people around you can do okay in your lives, that's not so bad.

Another thing is to consider the comparison point. How are you doing compared with the average person living in Mali or Vietnam or Switzerland? Billions of people all over the world survive in situations that are definitely not ideal, and many of them are happy with their lives some of the time.

Fuck doomerism.

Honestly? I have no idea. Probably spite. Why should I kill myself? It's the world that sucks.

Why not?

I wouldn't say I'm completely hopeful or doomed, the world is filled with terror and beauty. There are no gods or kings it's just people. Historic and scientific education can help reduce anxiety about the unknown, change your own beliefs and behaviors to improve the situation locally before joining organizations looking to make broader changes. Learn what your fears are and face them, otherwise it will cloud your judgement and influence your decision making process.

My Factorio engineer can't keep the thing going without me.

Find a small corner of the world you can improve and focus on that. Can only effect what you can. Not worth worrying about the other stuff.

As hokey as it sounds 🤷‍♂️

I don't have any. I'm just taking care of my family until I run out of living relatives to give a shit about, then I'm out. Peace.

Gaming with the homies. I ought to be able to get a couple dogs one day. I'm getting better at cooking. I meet new and amazing people every now and then.

I do my best to steer the world in the direction I'd like to see it go, and I try take pride in the effort, not in the results. The destination might look dark now but you can still enjoy the journey. I hope that makes sense.

What else are we supposed to do?

Edit: that's a rhetorical question, don't come at me enumerating the alternatives

By avoiding social media and living my life through memes and video games.

Jack Smith dropped the charges without prejudice so they can be re-filed the second he leaves office.

Donald Trump will die (don’t care if from natural causes or not) at some point in the near future. Just want to be alive to celebrate.

Running on hope isn't sustainable in this world, you gotta run on spite!

My dogs. I stagger their ages so that I'll always have at least one and thus would feel too guilty to ever kill myself.

Touching grass. It's important to remember that the entire world isn't online and the world isn't as dire as all of us chronically online doomers would have you believe. Things are chaotic-shift-in-the-status-quo bad, not civilization-ending bad.

The wheel turns, right now it's in a muddy rut and the people on the bottom (sexually active women, people of colors, and the queer community) are drowning, but all the little people on the outer edge are eventually in the dirt. Fuck the world, fuck the country, the people you have personal relationships with are the only thing that matters because all we have is each other.

Personally I have been trying to be more proactive, which has helped me have a sense of agency amidst the chaos. Everything I own fits in my car in case I need to leave quickly because of a climate disaster or the legalization of hunting trans people. I haven't bought a new thing (used, diy, or do without only) since lockdown because it's significantly cheaper and makes me feel like I'm doing my part to fight final form capitalism. I've also been exploring alternate ways to support myself and live that are more sustainable.

Over the past few weeks, I realized that I wasn’t reading the news to “stay informed,” I was reading it because I was bored. As a form of entertainment, it’s pretty awful. 99% of what I read will have no direct impact on me or my family, and just sitting there and worrying about it without doing anything to fix it serves nobody.

Also, I’ve learned to be skeptical of basically every headline good or bad. I saw a headline this week about how upset Trump supporters were with his cabinet picks. Comments in the thread were talking about leopards eating faces. The article was a collection of 8 tweets from supporters showing disapproval.

This news site was just preying on people’s hopes and making a story out of absolutely nothing.

So I started focusing on some personal hobbies and have tried to re-teach myself how to focus by reading some long form fiction.

Study of history.

People have been prophesying the end times for millennia now, for this reason or that reason. I think that ultimately they just don't like the basic fact that change of some sort or another is inevitable in the world, it will not remain static and no system or institution will last forever. This does not result in any concrete end, however.

To quote Morpheus, "I remember that I am here not because of the path that lies before me, but because of the path that lies behind me."

There's also a fair bit of profit-driven exaggeration in just how bad things really are in certain arenas. Bad news makes good clickbait, good/neutral news less so. So the ratio of bad to good news we receive is not actually representative of the full picture of what is happening in the world.

I keep hoping that everything is exaggerated and it won't be that bad. That he'll be out in 4 years and not become a dictator with no more term limits.

There's still a bunch of kindness around. There's good food to be eaten and culture to be consumed. There's drinks to be had and friends to be made. Dances to learn and skills to master.

There's a lot of things to be hopeful about, aside from the whole everything going to shit thing. And if you can brighten up people's lives by doing it, you might even contribute to the world going slightly less to shit.

I think it's time to recalibrate and focus more on the closer things. Doesn't mean one should ignore the world, but we're not fixing it by stressing out, doom-scrolling, and posting about it online either. We tried.

TL;DR focus on the things you can control and do literally anything to try to improve things

The thing that causes trauma isn't the bad event but the helplessness that accompanies it.

The main (and sometimes only) tactic that we are taught for dealing with problems is to find an intermediary who can do things on our behalf; seek the nearest authority who will take up your cause. Viewed that way, the fact that institutions and authorities are failing is disempowering; the problem is impossible because the schools/cops/companies/non-profits/politicians/media/etc aren't helping. The only option that perspective leaves you is to take the blows and hope you're strong enough to last until a better intermediary arrives. That shit will wear you down real fast.

We need to unlearn the dependence on intermediaries. We can't stop the bad events from happening (and boy are they happening) but we can combat the helplessness. The antidote to helplessness is exercising agency and feeling control over our actions and their consequences. Find a way you can make things a little bit better and then show up and do it. Anything is fine, if there's a cause you're passionate about then do that, but if there's not then pick something you're kinda sort of good at. Write, draw, make phone calls, create memes, cook, drive, listen, etc. Any skill, no matter how small, can be leveraged to improve the world around you if you're clever about it.

The fight is the point.

Taking action to control what you can is powerful. Maybe you'll succeed and maybe you won't but taking action is where you'll find resilience. If what you do doesn't work then learn from the experience and deepen your understanding. You're not failing to solve the problem you are building up your capacity to tackle it and that shit takes time. Pursue this as vigorously and as passionately as you are able but also know that it's okay to take breaks and step away sometimes.

Also, humans are social creatures so if what you do involves other people that's even better.

Most of the stuff you read doesn’t matter. What matters is how you treat people. Eat good food and smile, enjoy the rays of the sun which burn us all equally. Bask in a hot shower. Go outside, where you can’t see any other people for a few hours, and listen to the sounds.