As someone who lives in rural Scotland and is old enough to have got married before the prevalence of these apps, I genuinely never expected to find the way most people hook up these days to be so utterly alien to my own lived experience.

I honestly don't know how I'd cope with having to curate myself for some dystopian line-up so that, if I'm lucky, I can end up on these depressingly transactional dates, only to get these polite but impersonal rebuffs.

In my day people just got drunk enough to speak to the opposite sex, and if you clicked and miraculously still liked each other the next day then you'd start 'going out' with each other.

I can see how that might sound awful to many of this generation, but it was pretty much normal for us. And as a pretty plain guy with a reasonable sense of humour it worked out pretty well for me.